tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-19979513557925050082024-03-19T02:18:53.866-07:00Carolina Meets CaliA day in the life of lil 'ol me.Carolina Meets Calihttp://www.blogger.com/profile/17689636397954464751noreply@blogger.comBlogger93125tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1997951355792505008.post-68721363349682752512020-02-04T13:06:00.000-08:002020-02-04T13:06:22.411-08:00Thirty-One.<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
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<span class="s1">THIRTY ONE. Another year older. </span></div>
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<span class="s1">On my birthday I like to reflect and check myself.</span></div>
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<span class="s1">What have I accomplished?</span></div>
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<span class="s1">What are my goals?</span></div>
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<span class="s1">What do I want to improve?</span></div>
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<span class="s1">What to I want to maintain?</span></div>
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<span class="s1">Am I happy?</span></div>
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<span class="s1">You get my point.</span></div>
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<span class="s1">I can honestly say that I’m proud of who <span class="Apple-converted-space"> </span>I am becoming. I feel like I’m slightly a little more laid back (baby steps, people) and I don’t always let little things get the best of me. Now I’m not saying some things still don’t bother me to my core, but now I </span><span class="s2" style="text-decoration: underline;">choose</span><span class="s1"> to not react every time. You have to pick and choose your battles, right? I’m normally so quick to snap at someone or say what’s on my mind the instant I think it, but now I think that I handle myself a lot better. I’m not so quick or eager to clap back, I think before I speak (most of the time lol), and I control my expressions a </span><span class="s3" style="font-style: italic;">little</span><span class="s1"> better. </span></div>
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<span class="s1">One of my main focuses this year is my fitness/health. If you follow me on Instagram then you know how often I workout and that I don’t just walk around in athletic wear lol I love working out because I feel better mentally/physically, it gives me confidence, I feel stronger, and I truly enjoy learning more about it. Maybe one day I could get certified and train people, who knows...? </span><span class="s4">😉</span></div>
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<span class="s1">I’m becoming a firm believer in “speaking it into existence”, putting it out there into the universe hoping it’ll listen. Or maybe the act of saying something out loud actually puts you into action... I have a big goal in mind, or perhaps a new dream, that I want to put into action. I’m really hoping that this year I can because the thought of it gets me so damn excited.</span></div>
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<span class="s1">As I reflect I see how I’m changing and I like it! Physically I’m still a work in progress, but I’m happy to report that it’s in the direction I want. Im not into weighing myself often because I like to lift and I don’t do a lot of cardio. I’m gaining more muscle and really focusing on that mind-muscle connection.</span></div>
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<span class="s1">Obviously change can go either way, good or bad. Sometimes you can get so caught up and have that “tunnel vision” <span class="Apple-converted-space"> </span>that you lose yourself or lose sight of your goals. Never forget where you started, who was there, and/or why you even decided to. </span></div>
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<span class="s1">I like to remind myself where I started by looking at my ‘before’ photos. Seriously progress photos are so helpful. And sometimes it’s deeper than looking a certain way; maybe you started because of your health. My hubs always supports and assists me in everything I do. As well as my Dad who always tells me how proud he is and likes to make my head big telling me that I motivate him. </span></div>
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<span class="s1">I started working out because I was tired of not liking what I saw in the mirror. I would constantly complain, but do nothing about it. So finally I decided if I wanted change, I had to change. </span></div>
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<span class="s1">But let’s not just talk about physical change, even change in your mental or how you carry yourself. If you have multiple people telling you the same/similar issue, it’s time to re-evaluate yourself! If you are the constant denominator in a negative situation, it’s time to take a step back and look at the bigger picture. If you always have drama, check yourself. It can’t be a coincidence that more than one person is bringing up the same thing. The people you hold near & dear or who are closest to you try to look out for your best interests because they care; they may see things you don’t because your head is too far up your ass or your head is too high in the clouds - lets just call it that “tunnel vision” lol. So don’t be so quick to be defensive to those who have been there from the get-go. There may come a time where you can’t rely on them anymore. You need to remember who’s always there when things fall apart and don’t take it for granted. I am </span><span class="s5" style="font-weight: bold;">guilty</span><span class="s1"> of this. </span></div>
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<span class="s1">But all that “nagging” coming from all directions is life’s way of throwing up warning flags for you.</span></div>
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<span class="s1">I think that growing and maturing comes with being able to admit your wrongs just as you would admit when you’re right. I know I have some toxic traits and I can admit it. I’m now 31, but I’m still growing and learning. </span></div>
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<span class="s1">You have to find balance. I struggle with this everyday; whether it be with food or with life.</span></div>
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<span class="s1">I know recently the tragic passing of Kobe Bryant & everyone else onboard that helicopter has been a huge eye opener for everyone. It was a reminder that not everyday is promised. Since then it has been a constant thought in my head. </span></div>
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<span class="s1">So with that being said I’ve made a promise to myself:</span></div>
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<span class="s1">To pay more attention to my kids. </span><span class="s5" style="font-weight: bold;">There is nothing on this planet that is more important than your children - PERIOD.</span><span class="s1"> </span></div>
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<span class="s1">To </span><span class="s6" style="font-style: italic; text-decoration: underline;">LIVE</span><span class="s1">. </span></div>
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<span class="s1">To do something everyday that makes me happy. </span></div>
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<span class="s1">To remember to take care of myself. </span></div>
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<span class="s1">To smile. </span></div>
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<span class="s1">To be kind. </span></div>
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<span class="s1">To remember to call my parents more. </span></div>
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<span class="s1">To check in with my siblings more. </span></div>
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<span class="s1">To laugh more. </span></div>
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<span class="s1">To never forget where I started in my fitness journey. </span></div>
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<span class="s1">To keep dancing.</span></div>
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<span class="s1">To stop comparing myself. </span></div>
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<span class="s1">To remember I’m my own competition. </span></div>
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<span class="s1">To be thankful. </span></div>
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<span class="s1">xo,</span></div>
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<span class="s1">Steph</span></div>
Carolina Meets Calihttp://www.blogger.com/profile/17689636397954464751noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1997951355792505008.post-26399292291773863712020-01-11T00:18:00.000-08:002020-01-11T00:22:01.814-08:00Hello -- Again.Whats up guys?!<br />
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If you're new to my blog, hi I'm Stephanie. And if you're returning to my blog, hiiiiii!<br />
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Per the usual, I figured "it's a new year, why not start blogging again?" So here I am.<br />
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It's been so long so I'll give you a quick summary of what's happened in my life. My husband did return from deployment (yes, my blogs are that behind). He's now a Drill Instructor. I still work out, but with better focus and I've learned quite a bit). My kids are still constantly growing too fast. I'm still a stay-at-home mom.<br />
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But I thought what better way to make a comeback, than to share one of my near and dear stories. I'm sure I've shared some of it before; I may have even blogged about it in the past. But here goes nothing...<br />
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Where do I begin?<br />
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I was 16 & pregnant (before it became a TV show). Never did I ever imagine that I'd be "one of those girls". But of course, I was young and stupid. I thought I was invincible. Boy, was I wrong! Unfortunately, I don't have many photos of my pregnancy. I was too busy feeling humiliated, embarrassed, and scared - to name a few. Plus it would have been evidence of my bad decisions. Any photos that I do have I had covered my face or asked that my face not be in it. At the time I thought that I would never want to look back on these moments. Again, I was far from right. I wish I had photos of how my baby bump progressed every month. But how should I have posed? Hold my belly and stare with so much admiration and anticipation? Candidly laugh with excitement? It was such an odd time for me. It wouldn't have been the full 9 months considering I didn't find out until I was 5-6 months pregnant. [insert surprised expressions and gasps] Yup, you read that correctly. That my friends is what happens when you have (a little TMI moment) an irregular period. Not only did that play a factor, but I'm a small person so I wasn't really showing. Anyways, I didn't get to enjoy my pregnancy like most people envision or hope to. My whole mindset was survival. Luckily, being pregnant didn't deter me away from my schooling. I continued going to school until it was close to my due date and then I was home schooled for a short while before/after the birth of my sweet baby boy. I was due on New Years Eve, but he wasn't ready so I was almost 2 weeks overdue before I was finally induced. I ended up having an emergency c-section instead. But the relief was short-lived; this was only the beginning. I now had this little baby depending on me which made it much more real that my life had changed completely. I'm forever grateful that my family helped me, rather than abandon me. I still got to play soccer and I graduated high school.<br />
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Although I resented myself for bringing a baby into the world while being so young, I don't regret him. Having him made me grow up. He taught me to take responsibility for my actions, even if it was inadvertently. He made me better. I could have easily taken the cowardly/easy way out - had an abortion and pretend it had never happened. But I couldn't do that to someone so innocent just because of my naive actions.<br />
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*Actions have consequences*<br />
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My pregnancy may have brought some unwanted attention to myself and my family, but here we are 14 years later and thriving.<br />
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He's an all star athlete. He's strategic. He likes to play chess. He is a picky-eater, but tends to like foods I'd least expect (spicy tuna rolls, broccoli). He's competitive. He's reserved and quiet until you get to know him. He loves sweet tea and chocolate milk. He plays Fortnite constantly. He likes singing and enjoys singing in his school's talent show. He's taller than me (and never lets me forget). He's (for the most part) a great big brother. He still lets me hug him. He picks the most random times to give me hugs and little pecks on the cheek. He would eat McDonalds and Dominos everyday if he could. He wants to be a pro soccer player or Youtuber. Regardless,<br />
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Forever my baby he'll be.<br />
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xo,<br />
stephCarolina Meets Calihttp://www.blogger.com/profile/17689636397954464751noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1997951355792505008.post-71920391616548848582017-11-18T22:31:00.001-08:002017-11-19T23:00:30.356-08:00Month Two and Three Done!Hey everyone!<br />
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Wooo I'm so off of my blogging game being I never posted how month two went.<br />
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So now it's sharing time:<br />
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My Little Big Man went to his very <b>FIRST</b> school dance! I was being so extra about it and kept taking pictures of him before he left [<i>it's my job to embarrass him</i>]. He was going to ask this girl he has a crush on, but couldn't because she "got back with her boyfriend"... It's still so weird hearing stuff like that from my 11 year old.<br />
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I'm excited to share that my working out is still going strong! I've been feeling a little better about it since I'm starting to see small changes here and there. On the downside, I think I've lost a lot of my butt. So my plan is to shed the weight and then build my butt back up [<i>hopefully bigger haha</i>]. I'm having a hard time flattening the lower part of my tummy since I've had <b>TWO</b> c-sections. It's another challenge, but I'm going to keep doing what I've been doing.<br />
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Meal prepping has been interesting. I didn't realize how much work goes into that. I make the same thing <b><u>EVERY</u></b> week which is new for me because eating the same stuff usually bores me. I've also been eating smaller portions and less processed foods. I haven't cut anything out of my diet either. If I want a donut one day, then I'm going to eat one. If I want a soda then best believe I'll have a soda. I just make sure I don't go overboard and I continue to work out. I drink a fat burner that I <b>LOOOVE</b> and feel <i>actually</i> helps me (if you want to look into it, here's the link https://www.campusprotein.com/products/r1-lean-5?variant=5995743492). It always has me sweating like a hooker in church. I also recently started drinking a BCAA supplement while I work out - it tastes great, but I haven't been drinking it long enough to give an honest review. <br />
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Before my Hubby left we decided to watch Game of Thrones "<i>together</i>" since we never got into the series when it first came out. Well as I got into the 3rd of 4th season, my Firestick wouldn't cooperate and kept trying to play OITNB... No matter what link I clicked on or the fact that I cleared my cache/providers. So I just stopped watching all together. I'm just saying... If only it was on Netflix it would make it so much easier!<br />
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My Little Big Man's baseball season is <b>FINALLY</b> over. His games were for <b><u>TWO</u></b> hours long and super slow. He didn't really enjoy playing in the outfield, but he got to be starting pitcher and second/third baseman. He didn't like playing as much as his dad was hoping and he kept saying he couldn't wait for soccer season to start, but we're just happy that he even gave it a try.<br />
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In shocking news, my Mom was attacked by a dog that they were in the process of getting. It happened super fast and it was unprovoked. The owner neglected to share some of the history about the dog with my parents and when my family came over to pick him up (after already meeting him at a different time) he went for my Mom's throat, but <b>LUCKILY</b> my mom moved just enough and he missed. Sadly, she's still traumatized by it and is still in a lot of pain. It really sucks being so far away already, but when something as horrible as this happens and you can't hug your loved ones...<br />
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If you've been waiting to hear the latest on any recent DRAMA in my life... My oh my let me spill the tea. From my past experiences I learned that <i>more</i> isn't always better, so my theory has always been to keep my circle small to avoid any drama. Well if you know me then you would know that I am a <b>HOME-BODY</b>. I grew out of that partying/going out phase a loooong time ago and I don't like leaving the house unless I have to [<i>or food is involved haha</i>]. Well for some damn reason, keeping to myself really isn't working out anymore. It could be that living on a military base has us living in too close of proximity to each other. Apparently, I don't even have to leave my house - let alone my own driveway - without stirring up some trouble. First I was indirectly accused of being unfaithful, but <b>NOW</b> I'm being told that 1.) I need to get out of my house more, 2.) how I should spend my time, 3.) who I should spend it with, 4.) my kids shouldn't effect my time or social life, 5.) I'm lucky to be spoken to being I'm a military wife, 6.) but I don't need to leave my house to go to the gym because anyone can stay home and do it [<i>super contradictory but hopefully that made enough sense to you</i>]... Seriously, I'm not making this shit up. It was/is <b>INSANE</b> and anyone that I've shared that story with has told me to <b>RUN</b> because that is some <i>obsessive/crazy</i> behavior that I need to steer clear of. This was some #Swimfan type crazy. I was more confused that some random person would assume that they're in any position to tell me what to do...<br />
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<b>But I'm still doing me boo boo, hermit and all. </b> <br />
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We went to a Mother-Son Halloween Ball about a week before Halloween. We danced, took pictures, and the food was yummy. I think I was more excited that I didn't have to cook dinner [<i>haha I know I'm not the only parent who thinks like that</i>]. My Little Big Man dressed as Clark Kent [<i>because I can be super creative</i>] and my Toddler went as last year's costume, Aladdin. I thought it would be a good idea since there was a costume contest, but after getting there I realized some people go all out for Halloween! As for trick-or-treating, we walked around our neighborhood with our friends and the kids got a <b><u>TON</u></b> of candy! We didn't realize it until we were halfway through walking around that all three of the kids were superheroes. We had Wonder Woman, Clark Kent [<i>he decided to not wear his Flash costume like he planned</i>], and Flash. My boys originally <b>BOTH</b> wanted to be the Flash after we watched the TV show, but my oldest was not feeling his costume.<br />
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Anyways, on the depressing side of things, I went a little weird and bought the exact deodorant that my Hubby uses so I could spray it on his pillow. It backfires though, I sometimes want to break down and cry when I hug his pillow because it makes me miss him a lot more. I still have my moments where I get stuck in my feelings, but I've gotten better at not breaking down. I still miss him like crazy, but I just keep thinking about how we're moving forward and before we know it he'll be home! I'm so grateful we get to video-chat and message each other often. I think that aids in keeping my sanity. We've already been discussing things that we want to do when he returns, and I'm also thinking about hosting a homecoming party - obviously not <b><i>RIGHT </i></b>when he gets home.<br />
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I started making these cheesy, but super cute monthly photos. I saw a Christmas one on Pinterest that caught my eye and decided to incorporate the idea in our journey of his first deployment. Every time we reach another month into his deployment I come up with something to coordinate with the number of months we've <strike><b>survived</b></strike> completed. It gives me something to do and it actually makes time feel like it's moving a lot quicker. I know the pictures aren't top notch, but I make due.<br />
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Since it's taken forever for me to post this, we're already <i><b>close</b></i> to our 4-Month mark!<br />
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I was a tad bit worried about what our Thanksgiving plans since it's quickly approaching. My friends next door hadn't said anything and last year we made a trip to my in-law's house to spend it with them, so I wasn't really sure what we were going to do this time. I may have been slightly panicking since I've never cooked a turkey before and being it's just the three of us, I didn't know if I could find a turkey small enough for three. But I got super lucky that my Hubby's GySgt's wife reached out to me and invited us over. It was super sweet of her and I'm glad she did since it was looking like this was going to be our first Thanksgiving of doing nothing, which would have sucked because it happens to be one of my favorite holidays. I‘ve always spent Thanksgiving with family, but this year has been full of new experiences so I’m looking forward to this one.<br />
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Again, I want to say <b>THANK YOU</b> to everyone looking out for us. It still means a lot to me. This deployment has really been an eye-opener to see who's really there for me and my kids.<br />
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xo,<br />
sss<br />
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<br />Carolina Meets Calihttp://www.blogger.com/profile/17689636397954464751noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1997951355792505008.post-34980506353837250132017-09-10T16:29:00.005-07:002017-09-10T16:36:29.850-07:00One Month Down!Hello my fab readers! I'm starting to think I should have a name for my followers, I never know how to address you.<br />
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I'm a couple days late, but we finally reached our one month marker. Honestly, it felt like this month took <b>F-O-R-E-V-E-R</b>! (in my Squints voice)<br />
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This past month:<br />
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Our Little Big Man started <b><u>SIXTH</u></b> grade! It's weird saying that I now have a Middle Schooler now. I didn't even realize it until the summer was almost over, haha. Not only did he go back to school, but he also started playing baseball; which is another <i><b>WHOA</b></i> factor for us because he's always been a soccer star. Although, I have to admit that he has done extremely well with adapting to playing different sports, like flag football. I'm so happy that he's been stepping out of his comfort zone and trying different things. He'll always be my soccer MVP, but he's also our all star. On a funny note, it was quite interesting going shopping for his uniform/gear he that he needed. We sounded like two immature little kids just giggling away at the protective cups that they have to wear, lol.<br />
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I also started working out again. I've been having problems with the number I see on the scale. I miss the "<b><i>fat</i></b>" me when I was a tad bit younger compared to how I am now. [<i>the things we take for granted smh</i>] It's all still a learning process for me so I've been doing better at not focusing on that number and not weighing myself as often, as well as focusing on increasing my cardio, eating better, and lifting a little heavier. I was getting so frustrated because I started this journey back in May and my weight would just fluctuate. I took about a month off when my family was visiting just because I didn't want to waste their vacation time on me going to/from the gym, and I didn't want to be away from my Husband since he was going to be deploying. [<i>excuses</i>] So for the past month I increased my cardio. I workout 5 days a week and I do cardio every time, but I reserve 2 of those days to strictly focus on it; I used to only do it once a week. I've also started meal prepping. I didn't start this until a couple weeks ago. Seriously - it's pretty convenient. So far <b>I've lost 2 lbs</b>. It's not as much as I'd like, but I think my expectations aren't ideal. It's tough because I'm not always motivated, but I'm trying to stay on it because I have goals in mind I intend to keep. <br />
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We survived two appointments since he's been gone, haha. I don't know think a lot of people would consider that an accomplishment, but I was seriously stressing out about it. I don't necessarily pamper myself often, so I go and get lash extensions. [<i>girlfriend, it is not cheap!</i>] Normally I would go and my Husband would stay home with the kids, BUT because of obvious reasons that couldn't happen. So I made sure we charged anything and everything, and brought headphones. They were so well-behaved for that whole hour we were there. It felt like a weight had been lifted. I hope it's like that <u><b>ALL</b></u> the time [<i>again, not ideal, but a girl can dream uhkay</i>]. Then I had a doctor's appointment and I thought I had no one to watch my Toddler (my Little Big Man was in school). But then I remembered all of those awesome friends that offered to help if I ever needed it, and went from there. It's not easy for me to ask anyone for help, so I was a little anxious about asking. It worked out though we kind of did a kid swap for the day since we both had things to do. <br />
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Cooking has been an interesting adventure, haha. At first I was still making enough for the four of us. So let's just say we had plenty of leftovers to finish, lol. Once I got the swing of it my lazy side kicked in and I didn't feel like cooking. Now that doesn't mean I just said eff it we're going out to eat everyday, I meant instead I would pick something simple - hot dogs, frozen pizza, chicken patties/nuggets, or mac and cheese. The meals I normally reserve for my Little Big Man's practice nights when time is of the essence. Let's be glad I'm still feeding us, lol<br />
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I sent my first set of care packages to him. For some odd reason I felt slightly intimidated shipping them out, but the process was a breeze. I was surprised that both of my packages arrived in such a short time frame. Also, FYI USPS offers a kit for this purpose. You call #1-800-610-8734 and ask for a Military Shipping Kit. It includes different sizes of flat rate boxes, blank address to/from stickers, packaging tape, and clear receipt sleeves. Did I mention it's <b>FREE</b>??? Since the largest box in my kit wasn't big enough for the amount of stuff I was shipping, I sent two boxes instead. I filled one with all his new "necessities" and the other I made special by decorating it for his birthday! When he got his packages we were video chatting and this fool opened the birthday box <b>FROM THE SIDE</b>... [<i>there are no words for the look I gave him</i>] haha, but he 'closed' it so he can open it from the top and take in my efforts. I decorated the inside of the flaps with birthday wrapping paper and then made my own birthday banner, so when he lifted the flaps the banner would spread out. <br />
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I've been trying to make it a habit to get out of the house with the kids - other than for groceries, the gym, and/or sports - so we're not cooped up all day. We go on little frozen yogurt dates and sometimes we actually go out to eat instead of picking something up to just bring home. Although a lot of times it reminds me that he's not here right now. <br />
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I've had plenty of melt downs since he's left and it hasn't been easy. I haven't "gotten used" to him being away and I will never get used to it. I've only adapted to him being away. With him gone I kind of feel like I'm discovering my independence all over again. Before he came into my life I already did these things by myself. But once I was let go from my job and we moved across the states I grew to be pretty dependent on him. This deployment is just a reminder to me that you should never fully rely on someone else. I don't mean that in a negative way either. I think a lot of military spouses become used to it or comfortable with this life, and tend to forget that we can do the same things that they do. We can fix things when they're broken, take the car to get it's oil changed/tires rotated, pay bills, workout, go grab a drink with your friends, use the grill [<i>I haven't conquered that JUST yet, haha</i>], or make your own decisions. So to whomever needs to hear it, you can be independent and still be a Susie-Homemaker, etc. <br />
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It's been extremely comforting that we can communicate often. We don't get to video chat often because the quality is usually horrible, so it's usually messages and gifs, haha. The time difference does throw us off a little bit, but we're managing just fine. This deployment opened my eyes at how much we take for granted the things that are right there in front of us; and almost always we end up regretting/missing it once it's gone. I don't want to be one of those people who constantly put things off and then regret it once it's too late. I feel like this deployment brought us closer and I'm glad that it did. He left while we were in a happy place and it's stayed that way since he's been away. I know they say deployments change people, but I didn't know that it happened before they would even leave. I noticed how his mentality kind of changed and for the better. He's already such a laid back guy, but I feel like he's grown to be a little more stern. I was shocked [<i>actually still am</i>] at how he was blown off [<i>more than likely because of lil 'ol me</i>] before he left and how well he handled it. He wasn't pissed off, but it was more of a realization to him that he wasn't a priority to some people, and he'd rather move on than dwell on it [<i>go best friend! that's my best friend!</i>] Seriously, he's better than me because I would of been calling people out left and right.<br />
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On another note, there are no words to share how thankful I am for the amount of support and advice that has been offered to me and the boys since my Husband has left. My family makes sure to check up on us to see if everything is going well. As well as friends doing the same and also offering a hand. I know it's only been a month, but it's nice to know that they took time out of their busy lives to check on us and were even thinking of us. These are the people that I'm glad to have in my life. It's awesome, but at the same time it has also brought to light the ones that haven't reached out. I know that there are always going to be people out there rolling their eyes because they think I'm being "<i>extra</i>" or "<i>omg he'll be back, it's not like he's gone forever</i>" or "<i>dramatic</i>" or "<i>I wasn't like that when my spouse left</i>"...<br />
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<b>Shut. The. Fuck. Up.</b><br />
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More power to you boo. I am naturally a worry-wart and an over-thinker. My mind is constantly thinking about the next move or the what-ifs so I can't just blow it off; he's my person and he's so far away, and we're told that anything can happen while they're out there. So how can you <u><b>NOT</b></u> worry!? So to say I stress out a little would be an understatement. But now I'm to the point that I have a lot of hair falling out and some other stuff going on, so I'm practicing how to <i><b>WOOSAAAH</b></i>. <br />
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We got this!<br />
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xo,<br />
sssCarolina Meets Calihttp://www.blogger.com/profile/17689636397954464751noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1997951355792505008.post-71356212471956660542017-08-08T17:30:00.002-07:002017-08-14T14:55:15.574-07:00Goodbyes Suck<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
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Well our newest adventure has <b>begun</b>.<br />
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When his departure date seemed to quickly approach it felt like I was falling into a deep endless pit, and as we hurried to make sure we did all the things we wanted to before he left it felt like I was flailing in panic as I fell.<br />
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I guess that's the best way for me to describe what it feels like to have my <b>soulmate</b> taken away (for the time being).<br />
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It's kind of sad, the kids are still kind of young (more so my Toddler) to understand what exactly is going on. As we got in the car to drive to his drop off point, my Toddler was laughing and kept saying over and over again how he was going to work with Daddy - as he put on his daddy's cover (hat). I swear he was just tugging at my <b>heart strings</b>. My Little Big Man is not one for sharing his emotions, so he's been pretty mum. He's more the type that you have to ask him how he's doing and he almost always replies with a giggle. <br />
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The past week my nerves and emotions were a hot mess, but as the day got closer it was even messier - which was expected. That had to be the quietest car ride we've ever had. It was this <b>aching silence</b>. I didn't want to talk because I knew I'd start crying again. So I would grip his hand tighter whenever I held back a sob. As we walked along side him as he dragged his gear, it was nerve racking to approach the parade deck full of families/couples/etc. knowing that they're going through something similar. Although, I felt like everyone had their shit together meanwhile I'm walking around red-eyed, red nose, my throat was tight, and I was on the verge of tears... Again.<br />
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I don't remember the last time I cried this much.<br />
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I know it isn't goodbye, it's see you later - but it still breaks my heart. I know I'm not the only person to ever go through this, nor the last. But none of that means you can't feel sad or upset because people have already gone through something similar. And yes, I mean <b>SIMILAR</b> because not everyone has the same <b>EXACT</b> experience. So I just want to say for all of you that follow my blog and/or my social media be prepared to read how much I miss him. Seriously, how often do you have your spouse leave for months or weeks at a time? That's not something normal in the work place. So you're damn right I'm going to be in my feelings. I know I'm not going to die without him, but sometimes it sure does feel that way. He's my person. And it's not only the not seeing each other for a long period of time part, but you also have to factor in that anything can happen out there - GOD FORBID! <b>So it pisses me off and saddens me that there wasn't more effort put in to saying goodbye to him. But it's like my Husband says "that's on them". </b>I believe that it takes a strong person to go through what we go through as a military spouse/SO or dependent. This will be my first to experience a deployment so I can't really say I've been through enough to say I'm strong, but I know that we got this.<br />
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The memory I can't get out of my head is the urgency we both felt as the different posts were being called to load up in the buses. So we hugged for as long as we could while the kids laid at our feet. Then we cried even more and hugged even tighter - I just didn't want to let go. It was that "this is it" feeling because that was it, our final goodbyes. So when it was his turn we let go of each other, and he turned around and waved at us... <i>And that's when it felt like my heart just shattered to pieces.</i><br />
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I'm already counting down the days for when he comes home to us.<br />
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xo,<br />
sssCarolina Meets Calihttp://www.blogger.com/profile/17689636397954464751noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1997951355792505008.post-36592906422944728922017-07-26T11:28:00.004-07:002017-09-19T08:54:04.824-07:00Family is EverythingHi everyone!<br />
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When I'm not acting like a '<i>girl in junior high</i>' or brainwashing my grown ass husband, this '<i>lovely bride</i>' throws her husband a going away party.</div>
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I did just that and I'm so happy that I did. Everyone seemed to have had a blast and the food was delicious. My mom made some of her popular Filipino dishes to throw into the mix of burgers, fruit bowls, chips, etc. I'm so glad that my family got to be here to be apart of this transition into the next chapter of our lives, as well as the friends that could make it. We wanted to celebrate with all our family and friends and although some couldn't make it (and some <b>chose</b> not to) I'm thankful we got to do it while my family was here visiting. </div>
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Speaking of them being here, it felt great to be around family again. My family is super close and we're very open with each other, and they've always been such a huge support system. Which is why I was so happy they got to be here for a while because having a solid support system is so <b>crucial</b> - especially with what's to come - <b>IN LESS THAN TWO WEEKS!</b> I feel like right now is time sensitive and fragile, so spending time with my husband/kids and my family felt beyond amazing! With my husband's deployment nearing I'm grateful I have my supportive family to lean on, whether it be a phone call or while they were here. When they were here they helped me lose track of time since we were so busy exploring CA and just enjoying each other's company. We went to the Sky Zone Trampoline Park, San Diego Zoo, the beach, Disney California Adventure Park, and the Pirate's Dinner Adventure. On top of all that, my mom did a lot of cooking while she was here. She even hooked us up with her famous Lumpia and secret sauce [<i>I'm seriously drooling over here</i>]. I felt like <b><u>we</u></b> were the ones on vacation! It also almost felt like I was back home, we were just missing some of my siblings/their families. <br />
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I've been debating about going back home. I thought I had my mind made up 100% that we'd stay here until he got back and then wait for our next steps in his military career, but apart of me feels like we should go back home because we have my big ass family to depend on. Back home I have my family, friends that I would love to see again, and I wouldn't have to worry about dealing with assholes or fake people. And let's not forget the food I've been missing! [<i>I'm talking about you Smithfield's BBQ, Musashi's, Zaxby's, and Bojangles!</i>] I'm not saying going home means I have 'babysitters' as some like to call it because I'm definitely not the type to dump my kids on my parents every chance that I get. Going home just seems comforting.</div>
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I just can't believe in <b>less than two weeks</b> he's going to be gone - and for a long time. I keep finding myself dreading the day we have to make that trip to drop him off and say our goodbyes. My throat gets tight, my eyes begin to water, and I feel myself wanting to ball my eyes out. The longest time we've ever spent apart was a week. We're not some clingy type of couple so that wasn't torture, but we also knew that he would be coming home soon. Everyone keeps telling me to<i><b> keep myself busy</b></i>, but I already feel like I kind of do with the kids and the house. I thought about getting a job, but with us down to just one parental unit I feel like that would make it more stressful for me having to juggle childcare, appointments, and school - and let's not forget I would still have to cook/clean. I'm trying to remain hopeful [<i>and remember to take deep breaths</i>], but this is our <b>first</b> deployment. And I didn't forget the kids, I can't help but stress how the transition is going to be for them. I know that I have to be strong/tough for them, but I know it's also okay to have bad days. It's hard to want to spend and enjoy every waking minute together without the other stuff clouding my mind.</div>
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I'm aware that I'll get the "<i>that's what you get for marrying someone in the military</i>" comment from some seasoned military spouse or someone who doesn't know any better, but none of that changes my feelings. <b>It still sucks</b>. But how lucky am I that I found someone who is brave and bad ass enough to enlist in a job like this? So yes, the military life isn't all rainbows and butterflies, but it has it's moments. Some say "<i>only the strongest can handle this</i>" and apparently to a lot of my family and friends think that <u><b>I</b></u> fall into that category. But this is unknown waters for me - I'm nervous, scared, sad, stressed... I'm truly flattered that some think so highly of me and what I can handle, but this is a biggie.</div>
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It hasn't even happened just yet, but it's like I'm already anticipating the countdown of his return.</div>
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I truly believe that <b>family is everything</b>. They are always there when shit hits the fan or things fall apart [<i>at least I know that mine are</i>]. When I care about someone I don't appreciate when they are mistreated - in any shape or form. I go into protective mode. I feel that everything is a choice. So when people make choices due to their own selfishness or are just down right inconsiderate, I feel they can't blame anyone else but themselves when things don't go their way. I'll leave it at that.</div>
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Just some words of wisdom from yours truly.</div>
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xo,</div>
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sss</div>
Carolina Meets Calihttp://www.blogger.com/profile/17689636397954464751noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1997951355792505008.post-54527682834863493022017-06-22T00:09:00.005-07:002017-06-22T00:10:39.280-07:00I'm Not ReadyGood morning world.<br />
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I have a little over <b><i>five weeks</i></b> before my life changes for a while. To say that I am '<i>nervous</i>' would be an understatement.<br />
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I am <b>terrified</b>, <b>sad</b>, <b>scared</b>, etc. [<i>you catch my drift</i>]<br />
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I know this was bound to happen, but that was never going to change my feelings about it; it still sucks and I still wish he doesn't have to go.<br />
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It's all I think about. I could be spending my time concerned that some of my family are upset with me and have unfriended me, but that isn't a priority [<i>you all know how big I am on priorities</i>]. Apparently, I'm only "allowed" to rant about things <b>non</b>-family related, otherwise I'm not allowed to have an opinion [<i>insert eye roll</i>]. So if you're one of those people who read my blog strictly to run back to my family and bitch about me and/or roll your eyes at my commentary, go ahead and click the 'X' in the top right corner - your count on my Page Views isn't needed.<br />
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*For future reference to anyone associated with me and not saying this was the intention recently, but un-following me on any social media platform or not speaking to me is not a <b>jab</b> at me. Period.<br />
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Anyways, as the time is quickly approaching I feel like we're trying to smoosh anything and everything possible into the time we have left together. This past weekend we went to <u>Medieval Times</u>. I was on the fence about it, but we actually had such a good time! So if you've been debating about going - <b>go</b>. We had the VIP Royal Package, sat in the second row, and the food was delicious! I fell in love with the baked potato and corn on the cob that they served - whatever seasoning they used, I <u><b>WANT</b></u>! Oh yea, and the show was good too! I could tell the kids got a kick out of it; they wouldn't stop waving their flags and throwing their fists in the air. We also went to the <u>SD County Fair</u> for the first time. As soon as we arrived and were on the verge of passing through the security scanners, the front tire on our jogging stroller went flat. Surprisingly, the employees were extremely helpful and hooked us up with a tire pump. I got my cotton candy fix, while we played games and rode plenty of the rides. Both of my kiddos got lucky and each won a fish [<i>unfortunately, one barely made it through the night and died early the next morning</i>]. I guess we were having such a blast because we were there for hours! When Sunday rolled around we surprised my Husband with goodies and then treated him to breakfast to celebrate <u>Father's Day</u>. We finished the day with some fun at the pool and grilling out. It was a lovely family-filled weekend and I loved every minute of it.<br />
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Like I said, I can't help but think about it. I constantly catch myself thinking of the day he has to leave and my eyes instantly well-up. <b>I'm not ready</b>. Who is ever 'ready' to tell their loved one "<i>I'll see ya later, I'll see you sometime next year!</i>"... No one. If they tell you any different, they're lying. We attended a pre-deployment brief and though it was informative, it didn't calm my nerves. We were told that we need to keep in mind that our spouse's are leaving for a <i>combat deployment</i>. If anything, it made my nerves skyrocket. I keep thinking about how am I going to sleep at night and he's not there for me to put my foot or butt against, or bark at me to please turn off the TV because it's distracting, or hear him groan about having to get up early, or make fun of me for not properly opening a box/bag, or come home with my favorite bag of chips/candy bar, or grunt at me for not refilling the ice container - again... <br />
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I sound selfish, thinking about how it's all going to affect me, but this is <b>MY</b> time to be selfish. I have to share him everyday and I rarely get him all to myself. For awhile I was even debating about if I should or shouldn't throw him a going away party; a lot of my friends (who have experienced this once or too many times) told me I shouldn't feel obligated to and just focus on us. But me, being the <i><b>horrible</b></i> <b><i>bitch</i></b> that I am, decided to throw one anyways so everyone else can share their farewells. I figured he/we will be <b>busy</b> the last few weeks before he goes and there's no reason for us to travel elsewhere to accommodate everyone else - plus he won't be able to travel out of town the closer his departure is. In a sense, I'm excited because I'm throwing the party while some of my family will be here visiting! I'll have some familiarity and a piece of home here for a while. I've missed them/home and it'll be a relief to be around family again. I realized the downside is I'll have to tell them bye and then about a week later I have to say bye to my Husband too. <b>I'm not ready.</b><br />
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I want to hug him longer, kiss him harder, dance with him more often, and just never let go. <br />
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I may not be ready, but I can do it. It'll be hard, but I'll manage. Not to toot my own horn or imply it was anything close to easy, but I was a single mom for a while. So for all you naysayers who think I can't hang and think I'm ridiculous for wanting him to stay in the military, you have no idea what I can handle.<br />
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xo,<br />
sss<br />
<br />Carolina Meets Calihttp://www.blogger.com/profile/17689636397954464751noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1997951355792505008.post-35309384087991795432017-04-02T21:45:00.003-07:002017-04-03T06:56:48.168-07:00That's What I WantHey everyone!<br />
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I'll get straight to the point because I'm driving myself crazy.<br />
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Lately, I feel like I've been a tad bit in a rut. I find myself constantly saying "I want..." and so on. I guess the reason I get so frustrated is because I can list all the things I want, but the answer will always be the same - I/we "can't". I know some of the things I want aren't ideal at the moment, nor a necessity, but it still doesn't alleviate the fact that I want it.<br />
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I know right now you're probably reading this thinking "damn, she sounds like some spoiled brat", etc. I am right there with you. I hear myself and maybe that aids in my frustration. <br />
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I've come back full circle and am back at Square One: I'm not used to being dependent on someone else. When I was still a working mom, whenever I wanted something I didn't need to ask or in some cases BEG and whine like a child [<i>as I bow my head in shame</i>]... I could just buy it.<br />
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I want to replace the old/cheap dressers in our master bedroom to complete the room the way I've been wanting to. <br />
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I want to upgrade my cellphone and give my Little Big Man my would-be old phone. His current cellphone has something internal that's broken (possibly his antenna) causing his WiFi to not work. It has zero WiFi capabilities which sucks. The main reason we got him a phone was purely for keeping tabs on him, but<br />
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I want to upgrade my 9 year old dining room table to something new and maybe bigger.<br />
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I want to buy a house, but at the same time I don't want to settle here. California is a tad bit too extra for my taste. The place is gorgeous, but you pretty much have to live and breathe money to live here.<br />
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I want to make my own money! [as I pull my hair out and scream]<br />
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I want to be able to spontaneously wake up and go to Disneyland because I feel like it.<br />
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See what I mean... I sound like some bratty child.<br />
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Don't get me wrong, my husband spoils me when he can. I just wish that sometimes ***I*** can do the spoiling. I know we're married so it shouldn't be mine versus his, but we've always had mine versus his versus us. I guess it's taking my mind a while longer to get used to the mentality that it's ours. That doesn't change the fact that sometimes I feel like a child buying him a gift with money I've gotten from him. <br />
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But I've just been stuck in this rut that I'm unsatisfied with myself and how my life is going. I feel like I could be doing so much more, but I can't pinpoint what that 'so much more' actually is.<br />
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In the future I do plan on returning to the working field, but I don't know what I plan on doing. I've attempted to check out different jobs online that are available in hopes of finding one that I can actually do, but nothing that fits my criteria.<br />
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I know this entire post is nothing but me whining, but blogging it out is how I get it off my chest and clear my mind. I'm not ungrateful for all the things that I do have. I just have this feeling that I'm stuck in a box full of restrictions. In the meantime, I'm still trying to learn to enjoy the little things. If I'm lucky, maybe I can get some awesome suggestions from any of you lovely readers.<br />
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Positive vibes,<br />
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xo,<br />
sssCarolina Meets Calihttp://www.blogger.com/profile/17689636397954464751noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1997951355792505008.post-90303190979529197932017-02-12T15:23:00.004-08:002017-02-12T22:13:32.877-08:00Viva Las Vegas!<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEiQ-pveev9nx8mdRyb7f1bxnHz87eCIDtdkT0Q-m0gmdm5CtptIHjVUa-oEydmcXWW01jOEErK26R8ImfouJe8R3243zWWP8q1bxqwWIjlMo3iNGp7tB1_SWFPmKOPxbFoY3cyMSWg8At0f/s1600/cc11161b58947de998b43a5665e53675.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="317" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEiQ-pveev9nx8mdRyb7f1bxnHz87eCIDtdkT0Q-m0gmdm5CtptIHjVUa-oEydmcXWW01jOEErK26R8ImfouJe8R3243zWWP8q1bxqwWIjlMo3iNGp7tB1_SWFPmKOPxbFoY3cyMSWg8At0f/s320/cc11161b58947de998b43a5665e53675.jpg" width="320" /></a></div>
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Hellooo my lovely readers!</div>
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It's safe to say, <b>I survived Las Vegas</b>! We had such a great time. It was like a birthday and a long ass date rolled into one weekend. I discovered that I suck at gambling lol So to answer your question, we did <b><u>not</u></b> come home rich [<i>boooooo</i>]. </div>
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We spent the first day having me try out Roulette and Black Jack. Then we met up with one of my old friends I knew back in NC who just so happened to be in NV at the same time. He took us down Fremont St to check out what downtown was like. They had this super cool zip line that stretched down the strip, which I <i><b>REALLY</b></i> wanted to do, but I talked myself out of it [<i>heights just aren't my thing</i>]. </div>
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And when they tell you you'll lose track of time while you're there - they are <b>NOT</b> lying. We went to bed after midnight every single night we were there; my old ass couldn't believe it. </div>
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I started off my birthday sitting at a bar drinking before noon [<i>that was a first</i>], just to kill some time while my Husband played Poker. Later on we signed up to attend one of those lame timeshare presentations just so we can score some cheap ass tickets to see the <b>Blue Man Group</b> (#bluemangroup); which we got screwed over and didn't even get to see them<b> </b>[<i>huge disappointment!</i>] My parents had attended one of their shows years ago and had highly recommended it. The people who gave the timeshare presentation gave us the option that if we attended the 90 minute virtual presentation we could get:</div>
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<li>a free 3-day vacation and $50, or </li>
<li>free 3-day vacation and a free fancy dinner, or </li>
<li>free 3-day vacation and a discounted show. </li>
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I chose the show, which they promoted had two different times for <u>SUNDAY 2/5 NIGHT</u>. So as we hiked [<i>because it was a lot farther a walk than it looked</i>] all the way to the Luxor to pickup our tickets for the show, we were told there were <u><b>NO SHOWS</b></u> scheduled for Sunday because of the SuperBowl. Makes sense. So then we had to walk back, past our hotel, back to this place where they hustle tourists on the daily, so we can get our money back. And of course they tried to convince us to pick another show or to take the helicopter ride w/ champagne over the strip, but this birthday girl was <b>NOT</b> feeling it. I just wanted our refund. Instead the guy who we spoke to hooked us up with a better refund. I don't know why we even bothered participating. We attended one of these types of presentations before and I had been super pregnant at the time, it was torture - AND we didn't even utilize the free vacation... Never again.</div>
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<tr><td class="tr-caption" style="text-align: center;">We didn't plan it, but we ended up matching for the concert</td></tr>
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Later in the evening it was time for the the Ariana Grande (#ArianaGrande) concert and it was awesome! To be honest, a few times I almost forgot that that was the whole point of our trip. Victoria Monet (#VictoriaMonet) opened the show - her voice was amazing, followed by Little Mix (#LittleMix) - I loved their energy, and then Ariana came out and owned it. The show was great and even the people sitting around us were pretty entertaining as well. In other important news, I finished a beer before my Husband. Why is that even important? Well for one, I don't really like beer and two, he loves beer. It was a good size beer too, but I drank it like a champ. </div>
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<tr><td class="tr-caption" style="text-align: center;">Waiting for the concert to start</td></tr>
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On our last day we sat at the bar and watched the SuperBowl. Neither of our teams made it to the SB, but I was rooting for the Patriots. How about that game though?! I'm not into football like that, but even I paid attention to that game. I also spent some time during the game learning how to play 5-card Stud at the bar. When you play so many games on the machine, it spits out a free drink voucher. So instead of paying $15 a drink, we got 6 vouchers after only putting $20 in the machine [<i>aaaaay!</i>] Another highlight was their bomb ass chicken wings and fries they served. They were so good and a delicious distraction when the Patriots weren't doing so well.</div>
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<tr><td class="tr-caption" style="text-align: center;">Super Bowl!</td></tr>
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Sadly, Monday had arrived which meant it was time for us to go home. It felt odd being away from the kids for so long. I texted and FaceTimed my Little Big Man throughout our whole trip. So although I missed the kids, I have to admit it was nice having some 'us' time for a change. We don't have a babysitter nor know anyone well enough to leave the kids with overnight.</div>
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So would I return? Sure. But as a tip, if you ever do plan to go, it is <u style="font-weight: bold;">NOT</u> cheap. We stayed at the MGM Grand, attended a concert with good seats [<i>no nosebleeds over here</i>], ate a lot of food, drank, and gambled. You need to take into account that you'll need money for parking, or for taxis, tipping, and if you don't have a kitchen in your room you'll be buying food constantly. So you definitely need to plan and <b>SAVE SAVE SAVE!</b> </div>
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Overall, that had to be one of my <b><u>BEST</u></b> birthdays ever. My Husband went above and beyond to plan it and made sure I had a great time. I know it wasn't cheap, but he didn't complain. It's definitely <b><i>one for the books</i></b>. I don't really care for super expensive things, hence why I was so surprised about the trip, but it was worth it. I don't know how he could ever top this. </div>
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I love you honey!</div>
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Positive vibes.</div>
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xo,</div>
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sss</div>
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Carolina Meets Calihttp://www.blogger.com/profile/17689636397954464751noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1997951355792505008.post-70211714272043959812017-02-01T11:13:00.004-08:002017-02-01T11:13:32.116-08:00FebruaryHello and YAY for February!<br />
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Why 'yay' for February you ask? Well hellurrr - it's my birth month! <br />
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<tr><td class="tr-caption" style="text-align: center;"><b style="font-size: medium;">COUNTDOWN: 3 MORE DAYS!</b></td></tr>
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Not only that, but this year my husband is doing the most for my birthday. I have <u><b>never</b></u> ever been to a concert or to Las Vegas. So my husband decided to treat me to <b>BOTH</b> for my birthday! I'm so excited and somewhat shocked that he pulled this off because he isn't one for <i>thoroughly</i> planning anything [<i>hahaha seriously</i>]. He bought the tickets, asked my in-laws to watch our kids, and booked a hotel - everything! I'm so damn excited I could go streaking [<i>it's still up for debate</i>]. We'll be seeing Ariana Grande for her #DangerousWomanTour - I like some of her music and I'm not some obsessed fan [<i>I tend to cringe at her stance when it comes to politics</i>], but regardless I can't wait!<br />
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Being that I've never gone to a concert, I ended up looking up on Pinterest what to wear... I felt like an old person Googling some slang words to learn what they actually mean. I guess it's fitting being I am getting older -- <b>I'm turning 28</b>! I can hear myself from years ago making fun of my sister as she was getting closer and closer to her 30th birthday, now here I am. And I've noticed that as you get older, you get less presents... #SorryNotSorry but I haven't grown out of the presents phase. That makes getting older kind of depressing. So let's just say that I'm turning 21 again, I like the sound of that a lot more. </div>
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Anyways, there is still <b>no</b> news on the status of my Husband deploying; typical of the military. So we get to play the waiting game again [<i>this won't be the last time</i>] until they decide what's to come. I've been trying to not think about it too much; you can't stress over the things you can't control, right? Like I said before, it was inevitable that this time would eventually come. Every once in a while I start to think "<i>what will I do while he's gone?</i>" or "<i>how will the kids feel?</i>" or "<i>should we go home for a bit since there's nothing here for us?</i>" - etc. <br />
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It would be nice to visit home though, especially since my older brother and my SIL welcomed their first baby to our always expanding family! She is so precious and I cannot wait to meet her! She arrived a little earlier than expected, but I'm sure her Daddy/Mommy couldn't wait to hold her! It's still so crazy for me to picture my brother as a Dad. He's had the 'Uncle' label for quite some time now, but I have no doubt she'll have him wrapped around her finger in no time; if she hasn't already.<br />
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I don't know if I ever shared it on my blog, but in December we <b><u>FINALLY</u></b> bought a <b>brand new BIGGER vehicle</b>! My husband sold his car awhile back so that he can buy me a bigger car - since I'm the one who usually drives the kids around while he's busy working. So in the meantime, he drives my car until we sell it, then he'll get a motorcycle. I love it though, it's so spacious and comfortable. It's a 7-seater so if we ever in the <i>future future future</i> decide we want more kids, we'll have the room available! [<i>don't get any ideas, no babies for us this year</i>]<br />
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In other news, my kiddos are busy growing! Last month we celebrated both of their birthdays. My Little Big Man turned 11 and went paint balling for the <u><b>FIRST</b></u> time ever. He invited two of his friends [<i>prices out here don't play</i>] who ended up not showing or RSVP'ing [<i>so annoying</i>], so it ended up being a Daddy/Son date. They had a blast and have already been planning their next visit. They even got my Dad on board discussing how they plan to buy their own equipment, etc. Meanwhile I'm over here wondering where the hell am I going to store all of this shit... My Toddler turned 3 and has been overwhelmed with toys and clothes galore! He loves it. All he had asked for was some ice cream cake [<i>and I wasn't objecting</i>]. I just realized that seemed to be our theme this year - ice cream cake; I almost forgot how yummy it tastes, especially mint chocolate chip or cookies 'n cream.<br />
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Until next time, positive vibes -<br />
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xo,<br />
sss<br />
<br />Carolina Meets Calihttp://www.blogger.com/profile/17689636397954464751noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1997951355792505008.post-34100802070621255542017-01-11T00:26:00.004-08:002017-01-11T10:55:07.347-08:00To My Little Big ManJ,<br />
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So I'm sitting here 10 minutes to midnight, watching the minutes change. It's like <i>POOF!</i> you're officially <b>11 years old</b>. If I could stop time, I would in an instant. If I could keep you and your brother in a bubble to protect you from everything bad, I would. You have grown into this amazing little boy, whom pretty soon I won't even be able to call you that anymore. As I sit here by myself and reminisce I just can't believe it. <br />
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After I had you, there were plenty of times where I sat to myself and just thought "<i>why me</i>". I was <u>sixteen</u> for heaven's sake! But out of all the people in the world, <b>you picked me</b>. I was young and dumb. I thought I knew everything and could do anything. I would sometimes think, that there are so many people in the world who would love to have the privilege I had to be able to have a baby, that were more age appropriate, responsible, and had a plan. But<b> you picked me</b>.<br />
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At first, at the ripe age of <u>sixteen,</u> I thought I was being punished. I felt like it was God's way of teaching me a lesson and throwing it in my face at how wrong I could be.<br />
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But I was <b>wrong</b>.<br />
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You weren't a punishment or a lesson - you were/are a <b>blessing</b>. You changed my life for the better. I owned up to the consequence of my actions, no questions asked; there wasn't any other option, but to go through with having you. <br />
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<i>January 11th, 2006</i> was the day my life changed.<br />
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There are plenty things I regret in my life, but you are <b><u>not</u></b> one of them. I'm sorry for all the times I dragged you back and forth, moving all the time. You were/still are a child and you needed stability/routine, and I didn't provide it to you like I should have. I'm sorry for some of the things you've had to witness at a young age, and the predicaments you were put in. Those are just a few of the things I wish I could take back. <br />
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You and I have been through a lot together and you've always handled it like a champ, never really complaining like you probably wanted to. And I know that you were so used to being my baby - my only baby. So having a little brother was definitely a game changer and a big adjustment, but per the usual you took in stride. There are a lot of days, that I wish I had more patience and the motivation to be the Mom you and your brother deserve; which is something I'm working on a lot more. I know I'm probably not a lot of fun to be around most days, but I just want you to know that I'm trying.<br />
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My words are kind of all over the place, but I just wanted to emphasize how proud I am of you; I don't think I say it enough. And even though there are plenty of days where you make me want to pull my hair out, you're still one of my favorite people. You are so smart, handsome, goofy, and compassionate - and so much more.<br />
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I love you to infinite and beyond, Happy Birthday!<br />
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<b><b><i>“I'll love you forever, I'll like you for always, as long as I'm living my baby you'll be.”</i></b></b></div>
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<tr><td class="tr-caption" style="text-align: center;">First Christmas</td></tr>
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<tr><td class="tr-caption" style="text-align: center;">He loved soccer so much, he could taste it.</td></tr>
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<tr><td class="tr-caption" style="text-align: center;">4th Birthday</td></tr>
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<tr><td style="text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEh_u-W2x9y6zapFwCoCI0MV-LX6KSB_16xHrvoY-YGVphyphenhyphenk2f2rwMPA0mSlJRciqdQC0rzdCoIrs2uQiVyahp3NzHtyg1KxZlGA6ub-rXOf6yQU0tSKUAg2zy9OvOj0lG1kgiLu8GRZ6MdW/s1600/Jay-Kindergarden.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto;"><img border="0" height="320" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEh_u-W2x9y6zapFwCoCI0MV-LX6KSB_16xHrvoY-YGVphyphenhyphenk2f2rwMPA0mSlJRciqdQC0rzdCoIrs2uQiVyahp3NzHtyg1KxZlGA6ub-rXOf6yQU0tSKUAg2zy9OvOj0lG1kgiLu8GRZ6MdW/s320/Jay-Kindergarden.jpg" width="239" /></a></td></tr>
<tr><td class="tr-caption" style="text-align: center;">Kindergarten</td></tr>
</tbody></table>
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<tr><td style="text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjpvuYVOOuAJ46P560yXUEXisIO9CSotk9gmqjna0H-fmVRdN2R3eQAxHsTqP3AsbIhKFeS2deKrgq5aY2ZL1iRTR1fye0-jdOVwDMnFR1jCxDYM2pTfatERmqUv3ckv1h-DLCEHpwNXJ5V/s1600/Jay-Soccer.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto;"><img border="0" height="240" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjpvuYVOOuAJ46P560yXUEXisIO9CSotk9gmqjna0H-fmVRdN2R3eQAxHsTqP3AsbIhKFeS2deKrgq5aY2ZL1iRTR1fye0-jdOVwDMnFR1jCxDYM2pTfatERmqUv3ckv1h-DLCEHpwNXJ5V/s320/Jay-Soccer.jpg" width="320" /></a></td></tr>
<tr><td class="tr-caption" style="text-align: center;">Who knew that signing him up for recreational soccer, meant witnessing a soccer star in the making.</td></tr>
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<b>
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<tr><td style="text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEi1ibxJ6eh6ZDeUJV1YSCKyr9FYiT8BAx2rrksk36GDlqCnPV-gH7kvGz49kJXMhmusOg3hZrUJQzAOJ5DTzX2MybGdyZ53SnJM5qkWe-q9mRLJJY25NUd1g4UrcMnx7tH4W6Vz6WiaxSGX/s1600/Jay-BigBro.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto;"><img border="0" height="320" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEi1ibxJ6eh6ZDeUJV1YSCKyr9FYiT8BAx2rrksk36GDlqCnPV-gH7kvGz49kJXMhmusOg3hZrUJQzAOJ5DTzX2MybGdyZ53SnJM5qkWe-q9mRLJJY25NUd1g4UrcMnx7tH4W6Vz6WiaxSGX/s320/Jay-BigBro.jpg" width="320" /></a></td></tr>
<tr><td class="tr-caption" style="text-align: center;">He is such an amazing big brother.</td></tr>
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</b><br />
<b>
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<tr><td style="text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEiJOhmxXrAfRAbuFYh5XPvNGiZufCou3cu9iR9ySFEkw2UbxD63c5yuOe2NzFshj_ZQETHMjs0ARun25ENVTMGZ2cFeL3SJjE-t47lmfUXXwpr2Y72jfjo6nLcnrF6yCKZZpyog8b8wnnTg/s1600/Jay-Choir.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto;"><img border="0" height="320" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEiJOhmxXrAfRAbuFYh5XPvNGiZufCou3cu9iR9ySFEkw2UbxD63c5yuOe2NzFshj_ZQETHMjs0ARun25ENVTMGZ2cFeL3SJjE-t47lmfUXXwpr2Y72jfjo6nLcnrF6yCKZZpyog8b8wnnTg/s320/Jay-Choir.jpg" width="320" /></a></td></tr>
<tr><td class="tr-caption" style="text-align: center;">He stepped out of his shell and wanted to join Choir.</td></tr>
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</b><br />
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<tr><td style="text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjC7WlvzcuxZncXG6evtsCi3LoMfwgXR4-exjTLMC2ufdB-c4Y_MNFBbVxnivZnpoXyku5mxeEvmCxBGy1W1neD82TYeZ8Y2KReNc768i4DGy3JwSmNPCd1WoLGuhAOnS-3qcY_ntirD43x/s1600/Jay-ThisXmas.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto;"><img border="0" height="320" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjC7WlvzcuxZncXG6evtsCi3LoMfwgXR4-exjTLMC2ufdB-c4Y_MNFBbVxnivZnpoXyku5mxeEvmCxBGy1W1neD82TYeZ8Y2KReNc768i4DGy3JwSmNPCd1WoLGuhAOnS-3qcY_ntirD43x/s320/Jay-ThisXmas.jpg" width="240" /></a></td></tr>
<tr><td class="tr-caption" style="text-align: center;">My favorite picture of him recently, this past Christmas.</td></tr>
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<b><b><i><br /></i></b></b></div>
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xo,</div>
<div>
Mom</div>
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Carolina Meets Calihttp://www.blogger.com/profile/17689636397954464751noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1997951355792505008.post-7610681896482703992017-01-07T15:42:00.002-08:002017-01-07T16:09:03.697-08:00Two Thousand Seventeen<div style="text-align: center;">
Hi and Happy New Year!</div>
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I hope everyone's holidays were full of love and excitement like mine were. <br />
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Minus the obvious ache of missing my family, more so around the holidays, we had a <b>great </b><i>first</i> time Christmas on our own. I tried to stick to some of the traditions I had while growing up, but we also started some new ones. <br />
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On Christmas Eve we still baked cookies for Santa. Although our cookies turned into chubby versions of themselves, they were just as delicious and fun to decorate. We also had a small version of Noche Buena. We even had our friends from next door over to feast with us. I was a little nervous about cooking a special feast on my own and for a bigger group rather than my norm of just the four of us. I was so used to my Mom and sisters prepping/cooking everything, while I would stay away from the kitchen until it was time to eat [<i>haha I know I'm not the only one who does that</i>], so this made me feel like the pressure was on! We grubbed on honey-ham, green beans, potato salad, rolls, and pumpkin pie -- my sweet potato casserole was a <b>F A I L</b>! Apparently there are <i>TWO</i> types of sweet potatoes... Who knew?! Well I didn't; which goes to show that I never eat them. I needed the orange kind, but ended up with the white kind... So I ended up not making it. Which sucked BIG time because I was so excited to make it after I tried it [<i>for the first time EVER</i>] when my MIL made it for Thanksgiving. Everything else turned out great though :) I'm so thankful we got to do our own thing for a change. I love being around family <i><b>especially</b></i> around the holidays, but the change of pace was nice.<br />
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When it comes to New Years, my plans have always been a little different than what I think is assumed or "normal" for people my age. I like being a home-body, no hitting up any clubs/parties or getting shit-faced. My Mom always taught us that on New Years you should spend it with the people you love and want to spend the upcoming year with, have money in your pocket, have a variety of 13 kinds of fruit on the table, and something round. So I did and spent New Years with my husband and kids, as well as our friends from next door. We had planned on having a cook out, but it had been windy/rainy all day, so we moved the dining to inside. They couldn't stay awake and ended up leaving way before midnight [<i>we were all close to falling into a food-coma</i>]. Surprisingly, all four of us stayed up until midnight. The kids were so chill, meanwhile my husband and I were fighting sleep some kind of bad.<br />
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<b>I'm not one for new years resolutions.</b> I always find myself struggling to find a goal I want to reach; I guess I'm not really goal-oriented. Maybe that should be my resolution, to become more goal-oriented! [<i>haha</i>] There's no "<b><i>new year, new me</i></b>" bullshit coming from me. I like the <b>bitchy-sassy-cunty-funny-honest </b>self that I am [<i>yes, I called myself 'cunty'</i>]. If I had to pick something, I'd want to work on being a better mom. I know I'm nowhere near perfect and I have zero patience - for crazy children, clueless husbands, or assholes. So it's easy for me to lash out when my patience is on E. So if I can work on my patience, I feel like that would aid me in some shape or form in being a better mom.<br />
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In other news, my two wittle babies are getting older [<i>insert me balling my eyes out here</i>]. Pretty soon my Little Big Man will be <b>eleven</b> and my Toddler will be <b>three</b>. Where does time go?! I find myself looking at old pictures and videos of my Toddler, and just think "<b><i>Damn! Where did my little Newbie go...?</i></b>" I wish I could do the same with my Little Big Man. I have some pictures here and there [<i>compliments of my dad and sister</i>], but I don't have a lot like I do with my Toddler. While raising my Little Big Man, it was during the MySpace days. When MySpace had their face-lift, I lost a lot of my old photos. Plus, I didn't take that many videos back then. My Little Big Man is doing amazing at playing flag football. He started out with less confidence, but he's moving on up rather quickly. He even scored a touchdown during one of his games! My Toddler is growing like a weed. He's known his ABC's for quite some time, can count to 12, and knows his shapes.<br />
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My Husband and I are doing really well too. We got news before Christmas that he may deploy this year :( I am beyond terrified, but it was inevitable. In the three years that we've been together, this is the third time he "<i><b>may</b></i>" deploy, but this time I think it's actually going to happen. If and when this happens, it'll be the longest time we've ever spent away from each other. On the plus side, this would be another good excuse to go home for a while! :)<br />
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I'm looking forward to the new year and what's to come for my family and myself. <br />
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Positive vibes everyone!<br />
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xo,<br />
sssCarolina Meets Calihttp://www.blogger.com/profile/17689636397954464751noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1997951355792505008.post-50681657008193784192016-12-11T19:04:00.002-08:002017-01-07T15:58:00.290-08:00Spilling Some TeaHi everyone!<br />
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As usual, I've been away. <br />
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I've debated for a while about posting this, but what better way to make a come back than by spilling some tea...<br />
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When someone decides to taint or question my character and paint me in a negative light, I feel I have every<b> right</b> to defend myself; whether I share it on <b>MY</b> Facebook [<i>YES I'm allowed to post on there what I WANT</i>], read texts out loud to my husband, or even call my mom to get my side of the story in first... Regardless, it's being shared using different outlets and mine just happens to be writing.<br />
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In recent events, I've learned that I'm allegedly some <i>negative/no sense of a budget/unhappy/family-wrecker who should be expected to always make a lot of sacrifices</i>. <b>HA! HA! HA!</b><br />
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Let me share a little insight, as far as <b>MY</b> family and very<i><b> close</b></i> friends know - <b>I DO NOT APOLOGIZE</b>. It <strike>rarely</strike> never happens. I have always been that way; even my husband is well aware that I don't do it. It's one of my bad traits which I have no problem owning up to. So if I apologize to you for some reason, then good for you. I didn't think that I needed to pour my heart and soul out, as well as beg for mercy, or text some long ass apology when I didn't do anything wrong - I simply stepped down from being a bridesmaid.<br />
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Although <span style="font-size: large;"><b>I don't owe anyone an explanation</b>,</span> I'll lay it out for you.<br />
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<b>First:</b> My husband and I disagree, which is normal among couples. However, since we've been here in CA... Our disagreements have increased and they happen often when we've been around his family. I love my husband, but he tends to forget he has a voice, balls, or other plans; which ends up irritating me immensely. And I've heard it enough "<i>when are you not irritated?</i>" - well maybe you'd see a different side of me if you didn't constantly do shit to irritate me.<br />
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<b>Second:</b> It just so happens I was supposed to be a bridesmaid in my SIL's formal wedding that happens to be in the summer. I made a hasty decision to visit home in NC for the summer <u style="font-weight: bold;">because of the excessive arguing</u>. Since my Little Big Man is in school, the earliest time frame for us to go would be in the summer. I thought I was being <b>PROACTIVE</b> by notifying my SIL in advance so my spot could be filled - <b>8 months in advance</b>. I <b>EXPLAINED</b> it was because I was going home for the summer. From my point of view, I did provide an <b>EXPLANATION</b> [<i>Apparently, I was supposed to give a more thorough explanation even though it was NO ONE'S BUSINESS</i>]. (insert eye roll here) Since <b>MY</b> explanation wasn't good enough, it was passed on to my husband for further review and to pry a more detailed explanation out of him. He briefly explained that I was stressed, homesick, and we weren't getting along. I later discovered that that explanation <b>STILL</b> wasn't good enough...!<br />
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<b>Third:</b> Apparently my decisions had truly "upset" my SIL, but of course I didn't know that because <b>NO ONE</b> shared that with me. Instead, a text from me asking what to get their kids for Christmas prompted <b>unnecessary/disrespectful text messages that were undeserved on my part</b>. But I'm so evil and cruel that I took the time to ask what their kids wanted for Christmas... Hmm...<br />
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I guess part of growing up and being mature has taught me that <b><i>there is a time and place for everything</i></b>. I've been proud of myself for the amount of restraint I've had to use to bite my tongue, on <b>MULTIPLE</b> occasions:<br />
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- I've been bitched at via text message for not answering FaceTime calls because setting up, cooking, and hosting my toddler's <b><u>FIRST</u></b> birthday was my <b><u>PRIORITY</u></b> [<i>I never got the memo that other people's agendas were more important than my child's</i>]. I could have sworn my husband owned a phone, but I guess since it's not FaceTime, regular phone calls wouldn't suffice. So let's not play coy and use some bullshit excuse that it was all in good fun.<br />
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- Being on the receiving end of some major attitude just because we weren't so damn eager to delay our plans to babysit due to someone else's poor planning; we had already made plans to celebrate Mother's Day a day early.<br />
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- My child being kicked out of the bathroom just to take a quick piss (even though he was already in the bathroom) because someone else's child's schedule overrides everything and a bath had to be taken <b>RIGHT</b> that second.<br />
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- My child having a toy taken away because it was declared "unfair" that he got both - mind you, they were 2 <b>OLD</b> action figures that <b>belonged to his Dad</b> and he didn't have any toys to play with. So even though we just attended a birthday party, that was full of plenty of birthday gifts consisting of toys, 1-of-the-2 still had to be given away to make everyone happy.<br />
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- When we go out to dinner for celebrations, like my husband's birthday, he doesn't even have a say.<br />
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- Only being contacted when a babysitter was needed.<br />
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- Purposely having my son sit at the opposite end of the table <b>AWAY</b> from us because he had my iPad, which I purposely charged for this dinner for <b>MY</b> kids, all because someone else was unprepared. Again with the bullshit excuses.<br />
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- Last, but not least, having some spoiled/entitled/clueless brat have the nerve to tell me that I should have known better, being I'm from a military family and then marrying someone in the military, meant that <b><u>I</u></b> have to make sacrifices. *FYI, being a military dependent as a child and being a military spouse are two totally <b>different</b> things.<br />
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<b>Sacrifices...</b> For someone who thinks they know so much about me, that word shouldn't have even been thrown in my face. Especially coming from someone who has no knowledge or experience of the military lifestyle. I've made a lot of sacrifices and if you ever talked to my husband, other than when you need something, then you would know. I left my family and friends, I'm missing/have missed holidays and birthdays, my Mom has been having health issues, but I'm clear across this country instead, I'll miss my niece being born who's my brother's/sister-in-law's <b>first</b> child, and I can't even put my business certificate to use because I have my child who I take care of everyday. Not only have I made sacrifices, but even my son has had to. He had to leave his friends behind and his soccer league - sure that sounds minuscule as an adult, but if you ever experienced the military life then you'd be more understanding [<i>been there, done that</i>]. Let's dig a little deeper since everyone knows everything about our life/marriage. What sacrifices has my husband made? His marital status? His money? Since some people like to insert themselves in business that isn't theirs, let me clue you in - he hasn't made many to the extent that I have. Since someone has <b>stupidly</b> stated in the past <i>"it's only fair we move to CA since we got to live near my family for the past 3-4 years"</i> PLEASE enlighten me on how that was <b>"unfair"</b>... My family and I resided there waaay before the USMC was even in his sights. Was I supposed to demand my family move out of state? <br />
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Let's talk being "selfish". You know what's <b>SELFISH</b>? It's doing whatever you want regardless of who it'll effect because it's something you want; say selecting CA on a dream sheet <u><b>without</b></u> consulting your spouse about it. Does that "fair" logic still apply? [<i>the right answer is No</i>].<br />
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I even got some financial advice from the last person to be giving some out. All because I've posted Snaps of makeup I've bought or I wore a new shirt. I use money that <b><u>I</u></b> made from my leftover MK inventory and money <u><b>I SAVED</b></u>. So no worries, I don't take money from my husband, nor do we share an account for me to even do so. Even though I DAMN sure don't have to explain my financial situation, I'll put it out there. I don't have to buy things and try to hide the fact that I did.<br />
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I'm a family-wrecker because... I accepted the idea of celebrating <b>OUR OWN</b> Christmas for once. LOL! My husband randomly came up with the idea because in the whole 3 years we've been married we've never celebrated Christmas by ourselves as a family. I was down with his plan, but somehow that meant it was all <b><i>my</i></b> fault. Apparently, I have my husband under some mind control and he can't make his own decisions [<i>that's sarcasm people</i>] - even though he does on a daily basis. I could have sworn he's a grown ass man. But since I'm <i>"so unhappy that I can't be around my family, I make sure my husband can't either"</i>... Seriously people, I'm not even joking - this is what I've been accused of. Even though we haven't missed any family get togethers and even drove 3.5 hours to be in town for a kid's birthday party... I thought it was a tad extreme, but we still decided to go. <br />
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I'm negative because... I give off that vibe...? Honestly, I laughed when I heard that bullshit accusation. I guess since the holiday plans were cleared up that it wasn't MY fault, you'd have to pull some excuse out of your ass. When I don't agree with some things, I guess I give off some negative vibe LOL For example, I don't like when my husband wants to go to the casino. Whenever we're in SB, the casino is <b>ALWAYS</b> brought up - either to poke fun at me because I don't like it or because they legit want to go. Well because he is <b>MY HUSBAND</b>, I have every <b>RIGHT</b> to voice that I <b>DO NOT</b> want him to go. If he can tell me/his family that we can't go out to dinner one night like a night when I don't feel like cooking because we don't need to spend money, then we damn sure don't have money to risk gambling away at some damn casino.<br />
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All of this extra shit stemmed from someone <i><b>not getting their way</b></i>.<br />
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I don't care if someone's "<i>hormonal</i>" or "<i>frustrated</i>", that doesn't give anyone the right to be ugly to other people. I didn't deserve to be disrespected the way I was and I have no problem cutting people off that think it's okay. <br />
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I'm not down with the manipulation shit or second place. I married <b>MY HUSBAND</b>, not anyone else. Since he has his own little family, others' opinions <b>do not</b> rate what <u><b>MY</b></u> overall opinion is, regardless of who you are. It comes down to him, myself, and our kids. I will not come second and our family will not come in second.<br />
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*I'm well aware of how petty and drama-filled this is, but I'm clearing the air. People can have their own opinions of me, but since this is "<i>family</i>" and everyone's only heard one side, I thought it was about time to share mine.<br />
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xo,<br />
sssCarolina Meets Calihttp://www.blogger.com/profile/17689636397954464751noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1997951355792505008.post-24786307628197394862016-10-17T13:22:00.000-07:002016-10-17T13:22:44.358-07:00DIY: Gnat TrapHi everyone!<br />
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I think it's safe to say it's about time for a new post. But lets not ignore how totally random my post is... No worries my dears - it's short & sweet.<br />
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So for some reason, we keep getting these damn little gnats in our house. A lot of them decided to crash our house when we had<b> ZERO</b> fruit in our fruit bowl.<br />
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Do you know how annoying it is to try and eat or hold a conversation while clapping your heads everywhere like a psychotic seal..? It's pretty damn annoying.<br />
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Well lucky for you I've put together my mash up of other tips/tricks that I found via Pinterest.<br />
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<span style="font-family: Trebuchet MS, sans-serif; font-size: x-large;"><u>DIY Gnat Trap</u></span></div>
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<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhMTQxNloVbJ_AJjysNzUL2OVKOv4EpBUz3F3qPl6nPbmNOOw32XWWCGU4DnJs2qNkrV3EUs23ARnRxRuMoW_uOpHn9ArD5CA9ymnTqHuvyZzQHksbafT-SZmsJZzvV8uJEsHWjBMjDWUGi/s1600/IMG_5224.JPG" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="320" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhMTQxNloVbJ_AJjysNzUL2OVKOv4EpBUz3F3qPl6nPbmNOOw32XWWCGU4DnJs2qNkrV3EUs23ARnRxRuMoW_uOpHn9ArD5CA9ymnTqHuvyZzQHksbafT-SZmsJZzvV8uJEsHWjBMjDWUGi/s320/IMG_5224.JPG" width="320" /></a></div>
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<b>Things You Need:</b></div>
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- Mason jar</div>
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- Apple Cider Vinegar</div>
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- 1 piece of Paper (preferably yellow because the gnats are attracted to it, but white is fine & using card stock is a plus!)</div>
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- Small piece of a banana peel (any rotting fruit is fine)</div>
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<b>Step 1:</b></div>
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Place the piece of small rotting fruit in the empty mason jar.</div>
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<b>Step 2:</b></div>
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Pour enough apple cider vinegar into the jar to cover the small piece of rotting fruit. Don't panic if the piece of rotting fruit decides it wants to float.</div>
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<b><u>Step 3:</u></b></div>
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Roll the piece of paper into a cone shape and make sure the one end with hole is small, but not super small.</div>
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<b><u>Step 4:</u></b></div>
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Place the cone shaped paper into the mason jar. Make sure the paper doesn't touch the apple cider vinegar because you'll render it useless.</div>
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<b><span style="font-size: large;">ALL DONE!</span></b></div>
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Now you can place it in the ever so popular area of your home that the gnats like to fly around.<br />
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Then it's totally up to you to leave it alone or you can sit there and watch how crazy the gnats fly around when they get caught up in the trap... [<i>I won't judge because I may or may not do it too</i>]<br />
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I will warn you: if you place it in an area with high traffic, you <b>WILL</b> smell the apple cider vinegar. I don't think it smells strong enough to be that big of a nuisance.<br />
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Good luck!<br />
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xo,<br />
sssCarolina Meets Calihttp://www.blogger.com/profile/17689636397954464751noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1997951355792505008.post-13051790929499999872016-08-18T01:13:00.000-07:002016-08-19T14:49:46.755-07:00Adulting Good morning everybody!<br />
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[<i>holy shit</i>] I know, I know... Someone's been totally <strike>slacking</strike> <b>neglecting</b> her blogging duties. The feeling is mutual, I missed you too. I feel like since I haven't been posting with my constant bitching about world peace that I've lost major points to my sanity.<br />
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So after two failed attempts in the past four months, I'm back.<br />
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We experienced our first summer away from my family. It was definitely odd not being a part of the chaotic planning period for the annual family trip. I <b>TRIED</b> to find ways to entertain the kids so the entirety of the summer wasn't extremely boring. We made a trip to the aquarium. I knew that would be a hit for my Toddler because he goes nuts seeing all the different sea creatures [<i>seriously, the kid should be in a commercial with his constant Ooo'ing and ahh'ing he does seeing the fishies</i>]. We hit up the beach - which, may I remind you is <u>less</u> than <b>FIVE MINUTES</b> from our house. As for my Little Big Man, he had already been because of a field trip, but I think he still enjoyed himself [<i>I never know with that one</i>]. The summer came to an end rather quickly because since Monday my Little Big Man has been <i>back at it again</i> with his education.<br />
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In case no one ever told you - there's a downside to everything.<br />
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I love the fact that I am <u><b>FORTUNATE</b></u> enough to be a stay-at-home mom. While raising my Little Big Man, I didn't have that opportunity. I had to work to stay afloat. So obviously, with me working he had to partake in going to daycare. *I see no problem with putting your children in daycare (because you work, not because you don't feel like dealing with them).* I love working moms and stay-at-home moms because I totally understand both struggles - I've lived/live it. If you think being a stay-at-home mom ---okay stay with me, but lets use "SAHM" because I'm tired of typing that shit out--- is all shits & giggles, <b>wrong</b>. There's a lot of shit and plenty of giggles, but there's also <strike>sprinkle</strike> a lot of stress. I can't remember which "job" made me more tired. I'm not the type to sit on my finger and rotate all day. I have "To Do" lists I keep in my phone and alarms set so I stick to a schedule. I'm either cleaning, feeding, planning, cleaning, grocery shopping, cleaning, folding laundry, entertaining, and/or doing homework.<br />
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Speaking of homework... I forgot how much of a pain in the ass school is. It takes me <u>HOURS</u> to complete a lesson or two. I do have the option of just reading everything, taking my quizzes, and BOOM all done. But I like to take notes. Roll your eyes all you want, but those bad boys come in handy when time comes to take my final exam. My estimated completion date is December, but if I stay on track I'll be done my mid-October. I just have to stay. on. track.<br />
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Next order of business: my husband wants to <b><u>buy</u></b> a house.<br />
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Yup, you read that correctly.<br />
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Did I ever mention how I didn't even want to come to CA in the first place? But as the story goes, I go wherever he goes. Apparently, I signed my life away the moment I said "<b>I do</b>" [<i>I'd like to see proof</i>]. <br />
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Well I made the comment that since I love the weather here I'd be down to buy a house <b><u>IF</u></b> it had an in-ground pool and of course other house-type stuff I look for in a home. So we took a quick gander and I found a beautiful house (it is <b><u>NOT</u></b> cheap to live in CA - another good reason <b><u>NOT</u></b> to live here). So per the usual, I got excited even though I knew better. Later on, my Husband found out that you have to put at least 20% down. <b>ACA-CUSE ME?!</b> If that were the case, it would take us a good while to afford a house being we live off of one income. So then I start questioning how is so&so able to afford this and that, and we can't? Especially when some people claim to always be on some budget, but you see them drop money often. It was a rhetorical question. I have a horrible habit of comparing myself or certain situations to other people. We are sometimes frugal [<i>that counts</i>] and very debt conscious. By comparing our situation to other people made me even more frustrated. <br />
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He proceeds to explain we can get one when I find a job [<i>here we go AGAIN. If I had a damn dollar for every time he said that, we'd have our down payment and whatever else we wanted].</i> So my excitement high quickly diminished. You know what instantly flashed in my mind? The time we were looking into buying a bigger vehicle; he did the same shit. Anyways, later on a light bulb turned on and then along came a solution - Mr. VA Loan. So lets turn that excitement back up! Wrong. <br />
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There's too many variables at play before we can even think about looking at potential houses. <br />
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Excuses: <br />
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<ul>
<li>We need to wait until I finish school so I'll have my certificate to use to find a job. </li>
<li>We have to save up.</li>
<li>We have to look into what we can afford.</li>
<li>We have to look into the neighborhoods. </li>
<li>We have to check what type of schools are near us. </li>
<li>We have to figure out what my Husband wants to do with his life. </li>
</ul>
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Skkkrrrr! Hold up. Yup. My Husband is pretty ambitious, yet very indecisive. Which brings me to my dilemma. When did I agree that my life is solely based on what <b>HE</b> wants? I mean, sure he is the money-maker at the moment. But I didn't get forced to move here just so he can fulfill all his lifelong dreams. I never agreed to any of that. So my argument is why do we have to follow along with his life plan. Then he asked me what are my plans.<br />
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I realized that in the midst of all this, I don't have ambition. I don't have goals. I feel like I've lost a sense of myself. My focus lately has been being a mom. I don't even know where to start or even what I want to do with myself. The goals I had weren't specifically categorized, but I guess they were pretty generic: <br />
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1. To complete my course and graduate
with a certificate in Business Administration – (<i>in 8 months</i>)<o:p></o:p></div>
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2. Own a house – (<i>in 15-20 years</i>)<o:p></o:p></div>
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3. Save up for a vacation/honeymoon
– (<i>in 1-2 years</i>)<o:p></o:p></div>
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<o:p></o:p></div>
4. To work again – (<i>in 3 years</i>)<br />
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I think they're realistic. Growing up I never had some dream job I envisioned myself having. When I was younger, any time someone asked me what I wanted to be I'd tell them a model. I'm like a walking freckled chode with small boobs and stretch marks galore. I'm not psychic, but I'm pretty sure modeling isn't in my future. By high school I decided I wanted to go into the cosmetology field. Then the more I thought about it, I changed my mind. I didn't want someone to rely on me to make them look a certain way; What if I cut his/her hair wrong? Or what if she hates the way I applied her makeup? It seemed like too much pressure [<i>pretty silly, right?</i>]. <br />
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So since my Husband asked me what goals I had set for myself, I've been stuck asking myself the same question. I don't know how I'm supposed to set goals for myself when my life now is based on whatever he wants/has to do. What happened to good 'ole <b>compromise and sacrifices</b>? I don't see how I can make plans for myself when in 2-3 years we may have to pickup and leave again.<br />
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Maybe I should change my tag line to <i>"a day in the life of a military wife"</i> - who doesn't like a good rhyme?? <br />
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On a positive note, I am now taking suggestions for realistic goals :)<br />
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xo,<br />
sss </div>
Carolina Meets Calihttp://www.blogger.com/profile/17689636397954464751noreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1997951355792505008.post-48443042069297564372016-04-25T09:24:00.003-07:002016-04-25T17:31:38.006-07:00SAHM UpdateSo I'm 7 months deep into my <b>Stay At Home Mom</b> status.<br>
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There are days where I ache for some social interaction with adults - any banter that doesn't involve a cryptic to understand some of the toddler babble<span style="font-family: "helvetica neue light" , , "helvetica" , "arial" , sans-serif;">.</span><br>
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There are days where I'm relieved I don't have to get all dressed up and rush off to a day filled with awkward/unwanted conversations and forced smiles to pass the day. I can "relax" [<i>I use that term losely</i>] and hang out with my mini me. I can throw dinner in the crockpot first thing in the morning, meanwhile clean the house, maybe read a few books [<i>Pete the Cat is where it's at people!</i>], clean up toys about 5x before noon, and run some errands before it's someone's nap time [<em>okay, my nap time</em>]. Honestly, there are some days I can't wait for that time of the day. For those of you who aren't familiar - <i>yet</i>, it's similar to when you're working out and you can't wait to finish your set. So you start breaking down your reps or time into smaller increments to make yourself feel [<i>at least mentally</i>] that you're <b>almost</b> done. <br>
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Regardless, I am so grateful that I'm lucky enough to stay home and raise/teach my Toddler. I wish I could have done the same with my Little Big Man.</div>
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<span style="font-family: "helvetica neue light" , , "helvetica" , "arial" , sans-serif;">However, I've gradually fell into line with all the other yoga pant loving, jogging stroller pushing Moms. </span></div>
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<span style="font-family: "helvetica neue light" , , "helvetica" , "arial" , sans-serif;">*On another note - the attire around here seems to be fitness clothing galore. I ventured out to San Diego one day and almost every chick I saw, young/old/skinny/thick/chunky/lumpy/pretty/ugly/<i>#YouNameIt</i>, was rocking some Lululemon leggings paired with a Nike pullover and Nike shoes. I sometimes feel like I'm overdressed in jeans and a sweatshirt. It's almost like someone up above is trying to drop me a <b>big fat hint</b> by rubbing fitness all up in my face.</span><br>
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<span style="font-family: "helvetica neue light" , , "helvetica" , "arial" , sans-serif;">If you didn't know - I'm currently enrolled in school :) - now you know. I'm taking online classes to graduate with a certificate</span> in Business Administration. Might I add -- It sure is <b>time consuming</b>! Each lesson presentation and quiz/test that follows takes <u><b>approximately</b></u> 2 HOURS! [<i>key word, approximately. You try tucking in a toddler SEVERAL times and try to do your school work... In a two story house</i>] I also have to complete the reading assignments, respond to discussion questions, and complete an assignment to submit to my instructor at the end of every module I complete... Whew... I'm still working on finding my balance and managing my time a little better. -->Insert your helpful advice here<--<br>
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I'm still friendless [boo hoo meh]. My neighbors (to the right) seem really nice. We've only exchanged some friendly banter in passing and she brought over deviled eggs on Easter [ERMAHGURD <i>I love deviled eggs!</i>] So in return I baked some cookie brownies and brought some over as a thank you. Other than that I'm usually cooped up inside binge watching Netflix, cleaning, cooking, or entertaining my very active toddler {formally known as my Newbie}. I'm open to meeting new people and I know I have quite some time to do so. I just miss being able to have lunch or grab some coffee with my Dad/Sis or my girl friends.<br>
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I'm not sure if I ever shared this, but when we were still in NC we made dinner time an "electronics-free" time - no phones or anything else at the table. I value family time <b>a lot</b> and can't stand when everyone [<i>including myself</i>] has their face buried in their phone. So for the past two months or so we've made Fridays our "<b>Family Movie Night</b>" with the same rules applied. We watch a kid friendly movie and leave the electronics in the other room. I'm actually surprised that my Little Big Man really enjoys it since it's <b>ALWAYS</b> a kid movie he's "<i>already seen</i>" and I can't help but notice my husband gets a little excited when we finally make it to Friday [<i>other than the fact the work week is over</i>].<br>
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I had some different, <i>hopeful</i> expectations about this place, but I'm adapting like I always do. My goal is to make the best out of this duty station. <br>
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Until next time --<br>
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xo,<br>
sss</div>
Carolina Meets Calihttp://www.blogger.com/profile/17689636397954464751noreply@blogger.com2tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1997951355792505008.post-12561268144785397402016-03-08T14:09:00.002-08:002016-03-18T22:55:04.058-07:00California LivingHellooo from the other side...<br>
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So we made it to CA. We've been here for a about two months and I'm still <b><u>not</u></b> feeling it here. I don't understand what all the fuss is about this place. The only thing I've observed is there is a huge variety of places to eat at. Yet we've ate a lot of In N Out Burger, The Habit, and Chilis... It still takes the same amount of time to get to places to shop or eat. The traffic here is <b>ridiculous</b>. The people here always seem to be in a<b> rush</b> and are extremely <b>impatient</b> [<i>Kim you'd fit in lol</i>]. I haven't come across too many rude people - though I was tempted to bump a few ladies with my shopping cart the other night [<i>apparently some people here don't know the words "EXCUSE ME"</i>] for acting cunty.</div>
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I've had my moments where I'm homesick. My brother and his wife sent the sweetest gift a couple weeks ago. The day I received it was truly <i><b>perfect timing</b></i>; I was feeling down and they sent me some little things to remind me of home. It was very thoughtful and I love it. The letter from my brother, of course, made me cry like a bishhh. </div>
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The school here has totally thrown me for a loop! My Little Big Man gets a half day <u><b>EVERY</b></u> week [<i>where was this shit when I was still in school?!</i>]... Instead of being out of school for President's Day, he had <b>ALL WEEK OFF</b> because it was "President's Week"... So he loves that aspect. He's made friends quickly which I wasn't too worried about anyways. I was concerned his schooling from NC would be behind CA, but so far so good!</div>
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My sister-in-law suggested I take advantage of the long, but short [<i>it makes sense to me</i>] walk to the school since I'm trying to hop back on the <b>"I Need to Work Out"</b> bandwagon again. That lasted... <b>1 week</b>... [<i>I blame the weather!</i>] There was a week of bipolar weather [<i>I almost felt like I was back home</i>] so I didn't want to be pushing a stroller and walking against the crazy ass wind. This week I was preparing to start up again aaand it rained. <b>Excuses.</b> I'm hoping I get all motivated again because my double butt is peepin. </div>
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That's my problem - one of them.<br>
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I have <b>zero</b> motivation. I'm so blah. I don't know; maybe some of you can relate... <span style="font-family: "helvetica neue light" , , "helvetica" , "arial" , sans-serif;">Have you ever felt like you're not living to the fullest? That's exactly how I've been feeling. I feel like I haven't been living to my full potential. I've taken a very <b>tiny, itty bitty,</b> baby step and have been looking into schools. I figure it'll keep me busy and I've put it off long enough. </span><br>
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<span style="font-family: "helvetica neue light" , , "helvetica" , "arial" , sans-serif;">I just feel <b>lost</b>. I used to be so independent and now I'm a mess. </span><br>
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<span style="font-family: "helvetica neue light" , , "helvetica" , "arial" , sans-serif;">I feel frustrated, and resentful. I'm mad that I'm here, in this foreign [at least <i>to me</i>] place. I resent my husband for trying so hard to get us here. I'm disappointed that he isn't there for me emotionally. I just have this feeling, deep in my gut, that I'm going to be stuck here for the <i>rest of my life </i>and I never agreed to that. I'm frustrated that almost always, everything in <b><u>MY</u></b> life has to change. When we were expecting our Newbie, I often went to appointments by myself. When I was still a working Mom I was in charge of making appointments, taking the kids to their doctor/dentist appointments, taking time off when any of the kids were sick, and even times when I stayed home sick our Newbie coincidentally stayed home too. I don't know why, but I guess I had higher expectations.</span><br>
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<span style="font-family: "helvetica neue light" , , "helvetica" , "arial" , sans-serif;"><b>I'm not happy anymore.</b></span><br>
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<span style="font-family: "helvetica neue light" , , "helvetica" , "arial" , sans-serif;">I'm not happy with myself, or anything for that matter - & haven't been for a while now. <b> I need to be a better version of myself. </b> One that is less stressed. One that has more patience. One that doesn't get mad so easily when people copy my ideas or share their opinions when they weren't asked. One that is more laid back. One that is comfortable in my own skin. One that my kids can be proud of. One that is more relaxed [<i>I guess that falls under laid back - whatevs</i>]. One that laughs more and smiles often. One that doesn't waste my time and energy on irrelevant people. One that manages time better.</span><br>
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<span style="font-family: "helvetica neue light" , , "helvetica" , "arial" , sans-serif;">I just need to make it up this big hump of negativity and then I'll be on my way.</span><br>
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<span style="font-family: "helvetica neue light" , , "helvetica" , "arial" , sans-serif;">Until next time, I hope everyone has a happy Tuesday!</span><br>
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xo,<br>
sss</div>
Carolina Meets Calihttp://www.blogger.com/profile/17689636397954464751noreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1997951355792505008.post-82257402214367326902016-01-05T08:30:00.000-08:002017-07-27T10:47:02.731-07:00The End of My EraHello my lovely readers.<br />
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I swear, I have the best thought process when I'm in the shower. All the things I want to share are forgotten the moment I grab my towel [so frustrating].<br />
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So anyways, we celebrated our last New Year's in NC. My Mom's tradition has always been that you bring in the new year with the people you expect/want to spend the year with. I've grown up with that tradition and I have kids - No, I'm not saying that being a parent means you don't get to have fun, but it has swayed ME to want to stay home to celebrate. I'm not a huge drinker [but I do enjoy my wine] and I'm too lazy to get all dressed up and go out. I am a home body. Do I have any New Year resolutions? F*ck no. Why? Because I'm realistic; I know myself well enough to know that I won't stick to it. It could be because I never pick a realistic resolution; mine should be: To not hold my pee. I do it all the time for some reason. I used to be all up in that trend of #NewYearNewMe. Now I just laugh because it's silly; all of that hopefulness goes out of the window within the first week of two [don't even lie] - at least for me.<br />
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This Saturday we celebrated my Little Big Man's 10th birthday party here one last time in NC. We partied it up - or watched a movie [same thing for me lol] at the movie theater. By the way, the movie The Good Dinosaur, is a super cute movie with quite a few tear jerkers thrown in the mix. I think it's buy-worthy, but I may have an obsession with purchasing DVDs galore... <span style="-webkit-text-size-adjust: auto; background-color: rgba(255, 255, 255, 0);">The celebration came a little earlier than his actual birthday, but it gave us all an opportunity to say our goodbye's to more friends and family. </span></div>
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<span style="-webkit-text-size-adjust: auto; background-color: rgba(255, 255, 255, 0);">I've done so well with my emotions lately - at least the sad part. Any time I've caught my self thinking in that direction I'd quickly think of something else to get my mind off of it. Any time someone brought up how our departure date was quickly approaching I'd change the subject... Or tell them to shut up. </span></div>
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<span style="-webkit-text-size-adjust: auto; background-color: rgba(255, 255, 255, 0);">But before I start rambling on about how much I hate that we have to go or how much I'm going to miss my family - keep the salty ass comments about "it's part of the military life so get used to it" to yourself. This is my FIRST move as a SPOUSE. This is MY experience. I know my husband JOB is he's a Marine, but I didn't marry him nor fall in love with him because of his job title. So if you can contain your eye rolling to a minimum and continue without being a dick... Read on.</span></div>
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<span style="-webkit-text-size-adjust: auto; background-color: rgba(255, 255, 255, 0);">This is the hard part.</span></div>
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<a class="embedly-card" href="http://youtu.be/nSDgHBxUbVQ">Ed Sheeran - Photograph (Official Music Video)</a> <script async="" charset="UTF-8" src="//cdn.embedly.com/widgets/platform.js"></script></div>
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<span style="-webkit-text-size-adjust: auto; background-color: rgba(255, 255, 255, 0);">On Saturday my first hard goodbye I came across was my older brother. I don't see him often as is. He and his wife bought a house (that I never had a chance to see) plus got somewhat of an upgrade in the job department ($$$) that it ended up moving them a little ways away from all of us. So when he came in for a hug, I lost it. I tried to hold in my sobs, but out came the ugly cry. The car ride home was somewhat quiet. I don't know if my Husband was trying to distract me by continuously talking, but I kept getting all teary eyed. </span></div>
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<span style="-webkit-text-size-adjust: auto; background-color: rgba(255, 255, 255, 0);">I guess realization is beginning to settle in or it's now smacking me in the face that this is only going to get harder.</span></div>
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<span style="-webkit-text-size-adjust: auto; background-color: rgba(255, 255, 255, 0);">Next up was one of my older sisters and my nephews. I assumed they were leaving the following day, but they had to go back home too. We were all pretty stoked when her husband got orders near here because that meant we could see them a lot more. All of the boys happen to be around the same age so you could only imagine the chaos when all of them are together. </span></div>
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<span style="-webkit-text-size-adjust: auto; background-color: rgba(255, 255, 255, 0);">*I had this crazy idea that I could say bye to ALL of them at ONE time. I totally forgot that everyone has their own life (school, work, etc) so I threw myself off being I don't have either one. I spent my Saturday on the emotional roller coaster. By the way, I dislike roller coasters.</span></div>
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<span style="-webkit-text-size-adjust: auto; background-color: rgba(255, 255, 255, 0);">As Tuesday got closer I felt more and more nervous. I couldn't believe this was really about to happen.</span></div>
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<span style="-webkit-text-size-adjust: auto; background-color: rgba(255, 255, 255, 0);">On Monday my Mom made one of my favorite foods - Tinola. I made sure to stuff my face because I have no idea how to make it & no one makes Filipino food like my Mama. </span></div>
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<span style="-webkit-text-size-adjust: auto; background-color: rgba(255, 255, 255, 0);">Downfall is I had to say bye to my little brother. Every time I've tried to not cry, I did. He really wants to come out to CA so I'm hoping we'll see him soon enough. </span></div>
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<span style="-webkit-text-size-adjust: auto; background-color: rgba(255, 255, 255, 0);">Next was my other older sister and my nephew. I think we make each other ugly cry any time shit gets sad. I don't know what my Little Big Man and nephew are going to do without each other; they've grown up together. Last night my nephew was tugging on my heart strings. He started to sob when he hugged his cousin goodbye. It was depressing....</span></div>
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<span style="-webkit-text-size-adjust: auto; background-color: rgba(255, 255, 255, 0);">I tossed and turned all night. The bed we've been sleeping on isn't really that comfortable, but last night was worse. </span></div>
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<span style="-webkit-text-size-adjust: auto; background-color: rgba(255, 255, 255, 0);">This morning I felt awkward like we all had our hands stuffed in our pockets avoiding the obvious that it would be time to go in just a few minutes. I wasn't going to be the one to say "already you guys, let's start loading up into the car" so I kind of hung out as much as I could. I got teary eyed a few times watching my parents play around with the kids.</span></div>
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<span style="-webkit-text-size-adjust: auto; background-color: rgba(255, 255, 255, 0);">Then came time for my hardest goodbye, my Parents. I didn't want to let go. My Parents have helped me out more than the fingers on both of my hands. I don't even want to picture the holidays. I like to think of my Parents as home base of operations; we all come together at their house. So I can't wait until I come back [here's my tiny attempt at being optimistic]. </span></div>
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<span style="-webkit-text-size-adjust: auto; background-color: rgba(255, 255, 255, 0);">I've said it plenty and I'll say it some more, this is a big deal for my family and I; we are as close as close can be. </span></div>
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<span style="-webkit-text-size-adjust: auto; background-color: rgba(255, 255, 255, 0);">I love you all, this is only "see you later" - not goodbye. </span></div>
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<span style="-webkit-text-size-adjust: auto;">steph</span></div>
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Carolina Meets Calihttp://www.blogger.com/profile/17689636397954464751noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1997951355792505008.post-17395907571404801122015-12-22T21:50:00.003-08:002015-12-23T06:25:36.569-08:00Emotion Roller CoasterHello all of you beautiful people.<br>
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My has it been a rollercoaster ride mixed with a pinch of talent of walking on egg shells.<br>
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So we have about<strong> 2 weeks</strong> left here in lovely NC. If you must know, <b>YES</b> I'm still sad and not excited about it all [<i>you'll be stuck reading this in a lot of my future posts for a while - beware</i>]. I'm beginning to feel more nervous as time continues to slip away. I feel a little more relieved each time we cross off stuff from our agenda. We went to our last USMC ball which was short/sweet because the Husband was <em><strong>so</strong></em> uncomfortable in his dress blues and we had children to pickup. Our final house inspection went well; we ended up <strong><u>not</u></strong> having to pay anything other than prorated rent for two days. We finally got some exciting news that we actually have a place <u>WAITING</u> for us for when we get there - talk about a weight being lifted <b>OH MY GAWD</b>! I didn't like the idea that we were stuck on a waiting list and had such a big time frame as to when we "<i>might</i>" get off of it. There is one thing that flagged my nerve - there's NO A/C in any of the houses over there. Now I don't know about you, but I happen to like having <b>OPTIONS</b>. Yea, yea, yea... So we'll be near the beach - I don't care, you don't know my temperature preferences! Another exciting event on our Agenda is we decided to celebrate my Little Big Man's birthday <i><b>one last time</b></i> here, surrounded by family and friends. Surprisingly with both of us being procrastinators at times, we've already reserved his birthday location. Now I just have to make sure I order a cake on time [<em>one year</em> <i>I almost forgot lol</i>]. <br>
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For the time being we're staying with my Parents until it's time to hit the road. My, oh my, has it been interesting. It's like all of the timers on everyone's ticking time bombs are about to go off. It's like that pimple on your face that's on the verge of popping, that nut you're about to catch, or that fart that's been bubbling in your gut getting ready to say hello from your backside... It's happening. We're a big ass family with a bunch of different personalities that don't always play well together. I don't know if they're all supposed to go off before Christmas, on Christmas, or what, but I can sense the tension in the air. I think it's because we've been cooped up together more than what we're used to and we've quickly reached our quota. I know we're all trying to adjust to living together and trying to not step on anyone's toes, BUT - have you met my Mom? She has <b><i>a lot</i></b> of different rules/regulations/stipulations/guidelines/laws... [<i>I think you get it</i>] So I've <u><b>TRIED</b></u> to clean up after my little squad; which that task is a toughie when you have a toddler and two boys [<i>my Husband acts just like my Little Big Man</i>]. However, my Parents have been <b>VERY</b> accommodating! My Dad has been extremely helpful<strong> (like always!)</strong> with my Little Big Man; making sure he's up for school, dropping off/picking him up from school, fixing him breakfast - this is like <b>HEAVEN</b> for <strike>him</strike> both of them right now. My Dad has a tendency to spoil the shit out of these grandchildren [<i>"it's their job" yeeea shut it</i>].<br>
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I'm still this big ball of emotions and it's so annoying. A lot of times I have to hurry and think of a different topic so I don't randomly start balling my eyes out. I can tell that all of us are a <strike>tad</strike> <strong>A LOT</strong> bit stressed. The snappiness game is too strong right now. Everyone handles their emotions differently. You have the ones who are just straight up sensitive. Then you have the ones who will say what's on their mind [<em>why heyyyro</em>]. Then you have the ones who seem like they stay mad. One person, from what I've observed, will not let me catch a break - ever. I can be on my best behavior and think I'm doing a bomb ass job, but then get served with a pink slip that reads "swerve". You would think by now I'd be used to it, but yet I still have yet to understand it. A lot of times I feel like that because I'm so outspoken and tend to be the "rebellious" child that that's somehow cause for resentment or maybe that has given me a life time access VIP Pass to being labeled as the guilty party. You can place me in a room full of people and somehow my name will be dropped into the mix; I could even be asleep in that room full of people and I'd still be blamed for murder. I will never understand it. There are plenty of times where there's been some big family blowout and afterwards I've pondered what the hell did I do that there's always that hostility towards me. I wouldn't say it's hate for me, but a lot of times I feel like the scale is definitely heavier on that side. I would say it's because of us moving away, but it's always been this way.<br>
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Here's a funny [<em>not really</em>], short story I thought I'd share to lighten up the mood [<em>kinda</em>]: We have both of our cars <b>*PAID OFF* </b>[<i>say word</i>], but we can only be reimbursed for one. So our other option is to ship one of our cars. The other day my Husband mentions he thinks we should look into a bigger car to make our trip easier; that way we wouldn't have to worry about shipping one, we can ride more comfortably, more room for our shit, etc... It was like music to my ears because when I was still employed I had been begging for a bigger car. So one day we peeped several car dealerships in the area to see what our options were [<em>I seriously felt like a little kid at a candy store</em>]. He kept reminding me that we were just <u><b>LOOKING</b></u> and that we're not going to be impulsive [<i>hi, my name is Stephanie and I am an impulsive shopper</i>]. So can someone please explain to me why NOW we are <b><u>NOT</u></b> getting a bigger car!?!?!? Apparently, I misunderstood him. He said he <b><i>meant</i></b> he was only looking into it incase we wanted a new car a couple years from now... So maybe I've lost my damn mind or something, but I don't know what that had to do with making our move easier... Now I know what <strike>puppies</strike> children [<i>same thing right? jk</i>] feel like when you tease them with treats. So please remind me to never get excited over anything when he says it; k thanks. <br>
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I can't believe Christmas is <strong>TWO DAYS AWAY</strong>!!! [<em>being it's now past midnight and I'm still editing</em>] I'm starting to feel pretty hyped about Christmas though [<i>despite being jipped on a new ride lol</i>]. I bought candy canes because what's Christmas without any!? I even discovered Mint Chocolate candy canes... They are so delicious! I've already heard the best Christmas song <b>"Merry Christmas, Happy Holidays" by 'N*SYNC</b> -- "I'ma let you finish, but 'N*SYNC had one of the best Christmas songs of all time!"<em> [in my Kanye West voice lol]. </em>In all seriousness, this is my <strong><em>favorite</em></strong> time of year. I love the music, the decorations, the "togetherness" or the idea of, and shopping [<em>helluuuuur sales!</em>]... Okay, and presents [<em>duh</em> <em>we all do</em>]. Anyways, I hope you all have a Merry Christmas and hopefully I can post before we drive cross country!<br>
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Merry Christmas & Happy New Year!<br>
xo, sssCarolina Meets Calihttp://www.blogger.com/profile/17689636397954464751noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1997951355792505008.post-82651677704811570642015-11-17T11:23:00.002-08:002015-11-17T16:37:42.553-08:00North CarolinaGood afternoon!<br />
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If you don't know, now you know - we are moving to <strong>California</strong>.<br />
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I've been telling myself that I was going to type another post, but from packing, cleaning, organizing, soccer, and the ball... My mind has been in overdrive.<br />
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It was inevitable. Am I happy? No. Am I excited? No. Am I mad? No. I'm sad, stressed, frustrated, scared... I'll stop there.<br />
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If you've been following along with my journey then you've read how much I've <em>whined</em> and <em>bitched</em> about leaving here, <strong>home</strong>. I wasn't born here, but this is where I've grown up; for 14 years to be exact. My whole family is here. It'll take some getting used to not having them just 20-30 minutes away. I don't have a lot of friends, but I do have a few that I consider my best.<br />
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I am tired of hearing people telling me <em>"you'll be alright"</em> or <em>"you'll be fine"</em>... You get it. I'm sure it's just hopeful thinking. Please don't tell me how I'm going to feel. I don't know how many times I have to say it, but everyone has <strong><u>DIFFERENT</u> </strong>experiences! Your experience could have been a breeze whereas someone else's could have been fifty shades of f*cked up [<em>and not the fun fifty shades either</em>]. <br />
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I have lists on lists on lists. I've gone through all of our belongings and came to the conclusion I'm a borderline hoarder. So I boxed up all my "what if" clothes and all the shoes that no longer belong in my wardrobe and dropped it off at the Salvation Army. I called the school to find out how to un-enroll my Little Big Man. I have yet to take pictures of all our <em>valuable</em> valuables and note all of their serial numbers... With only 2 days left to do so [<em>helluuur procrastination</em>]. <br />
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This is a <strong>BIG </strong>deal for us. It's our <strong><u>FIRST</u></strong> <strong>BIG</strong> move!<br />
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I think part of what stresses me out is the fact that we don't even have a house. We're on a waiting list that supposedly is a 3-5 month wait. It doesn't help that I keep hearing <strong>DIFFERENT</strong> experiences, like one family who's been stuck in a hotel/lodge for 6 months <u><strong>STILL</strong></u> waiting on a house. My family had to do that before when my Dad got orders to Guam. We were cooped up in a hotel for a <em>looong</em> time.<br />
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I find it ironic how different it feels being a spouse versus being a dependent child. Growing up it sucked having to make friends and move to new schools a lot, but I rolled with the punches. It was never hard making friends; more nerve wracking. Now that I'm a spouse I feel like I'm losing my damn mind. I'm worried about my Little Big Man moving in the middle of the school year and pretty much starting over. I think he'll be fine in the friend department; although, he can be very shy. I'm more worried about his school work. I don't want to be one of those parents who just assume their kid(s) will get over it and just have to deal. I'm just lucky that I'm not working at the moment so I can be there for him if/when he needs it.<br />
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I know our town has little to none of super fun things to do, but it's my comfort zone. So to distract myself, I figure I can shed some light on some of the things (though few) that I've experienced here that I happen to enjoy.<br />
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1. <strong>Southern hospitality.</strong> Everywhere you go there will be assholes. I actually grew to enjoy the quick greetings from complete strangers. Which reminds me of when I first moved here. I wasn't used to random people greeting me or even asking me how I was doing. My go-to reaction was usually <em>"I don't know you... Why the hell are you speaking to me..."</em> I was usually nice enough to only <strong>THINK</strong> that and not say it out loud. <br />
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2. <strong>Bojangles.</strong> I don't even know what KFC is anymore. They have this amazing... I guess breakfast/dessert - Bo Berry Biscuit. I'm not a big fan of their sweet tea, but my Little Big Man <em>LOVES</em> it.<br />
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3. <strong> Cape Lookout Lighthouse.</strong> It was so pretty. We took a ferry ride to get to the little island (?) and on the way we got to see wild horses. Once we got to the island we got to tour the house and lighthouse. Those stairs were no joke!<br />
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4. <strong>Beach.</strong> The beaches aren't what I was used to while living on the West Coast, but who doesn't like the beach??? The water here is a lot warmer than the Pacific Ocean.<br />
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5. <strong>MacDaddy's.</strong> It's similar to a Dave & Buster's. There's food, an arcade for the smaller kids and another one for the older kids, a bar, and bowling. <br />
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6. My family took a trip to ride the train. It was a fun experience for all of us. At certain times of the year they have even have Thomas the Train that you can actually ride.<br />
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7. <strong> MCAS Cherry Point.</strong> I may be a little bias... But that's how I met my Love :)<br />
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So for the time being we're moving out of base housing and moving in with my parents until it's time to hit the road. I'm not sure if that's a good or bad thing. It's like YAY! We'll be surrounded by family more before we go, but will make it even harder to leave and say our goodbyes. This will be our last Thanksgiving, Christmas, New Year's, and my Little Big Man's birthday that we celebrate together and I want to make the most of it.<br />
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xo.<br />
sssCarolina Meets Calihttp://www.blogger.com/profile/17689636397954464751noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1997951355792505008.post-20732460076522628222015-11-02T11:17:00.003-08:002015-11-02T11:17:59.704-08:00Turn Back TimeGood <strike>morning</strike> afternoon [<em>paused for mommy duties</em>] my lovely readers!<br />
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For some odd reason, something last night triggered me to blog about... my past. I know that doesn't sound like anything good and I don't owe anyone an explanation for my past, but I figure I can clear the air and enlighten you. I don't know if it's because my family and I are getting ready to begin a <strong>NEW</strong> chapter in our life, but here goes nothing.<br />
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A long time ago I thought I was with the '<em>right</em>' guy at the tender age of 17; <strong>The One</strong>, so to speak. I had my oldest at the age of 16 and finally scored the guy that I had been chasing for what felt like forever [<em>bad move, you shouldn't chase any man</em>]. Honestly, I can't believe <strong>I was so stupid</strong>. I think everyone goes through that phase where they think they've <strong>FINALLY</strong> found their person; as if that's what we search for our entire lives. At the time it felt right. I felt like I finally found someone I could be comfortable with. However, I got <strong><em>too</em></strong> comfortable. I was engaged at the age of 18. Yea, yea... Some might say that was too young to be taking that step; I still lived at home with my Parents and I was still finishing high school. He pretty much moved in with my Parents too. <br />
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Do you remember the part where I said <strong>I was so stupid</strong>...?<br />
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There were warning signs from the get-go! We were so trusting of each other that we shared each other's MySpace passwords [<em>haha the myspace days</em>]. Maybe we weren't that trusting... We both always checked each other's inbox, sent, and trash folders [<em>crazy, I know</em>] like we were already looking for something wrong to happen. Shockingly, one day I did find something. I was doing my regular snooping [<em>okay, more like psycho</em>] and discovered a message in his Trash folder [<em>he forgot to empty the evidence</em>]. It was a message to a "family friend" who had a cousin (female) in one of his classes. He was running his mouth about how attractive she was and to let her know, etc. That was a little odd being he had a fiancé... However, I huffed and I puffed, then he apologized and that was the end of it. I didn't tell anyone. I didn't want to put him out there in a negative light; although that never went both ways. <br />
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There was <strong>no excuse</strong> for what I did. Fast forward another year and I ended up cheating on him. Obviously our engagement was off. At the time we were living in a small duplex together (our first place). He kicked me out and dragged my name through the mud. My "friends" at the time shared any of my <em>dirty little secrets</em> and<em> aired my dirty laundry</em> like it was nothing. One of them was his younger brother's ex-girlfriend {Brittany}. We were pretty close, but she figured the way back to his heart was to tell on me. I can't forget about the ones that I worked with at the time who fed him any gossip they could think of; one of them even slept with him {Amber}. I screwed up, <u><strong>BAD</strong></u>. I ended up moving back in with my Parents (the first of many moves back and forth).<br />
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As time went on, it got worse. When we'd break up he would drink and stalk me. One of the times was so bad; he snatched my purse (car keys/cellphone inside) because I thought it wasn't a good idea for us to stay with him that night. While wrestling for my purse back I got clocked in the jaw during the struggle, so my Little Big Man entered the room from hearing all the ruckus which resulted in him kicking us out of the house and him throwing my belongings out onto the yard. He was so angry he even punched my car window as I prepared to drive away. Another incident was so bad that it resulted in him getting arrested. There used to be a night club everyone would frequent. Since I worked on base I was always surrounded by men, which a handful were my friends; he never liked it. One night after binge drinking he hopped into his car and drove to the club because he knew I was there. Once he got inside he continued to drink and followed us around this small club and at one point even attempted to fight me; which resulted in him being kicked out. The aftermath concluded with him being arrested. <br />
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After that there wasn't much to rekindle. Any time we got back together, it was for a shorter period of time. He would always tell me that his boys were always looking out for him; as if threatening/warning me to behave/watch myself. I was called any name you could think of. He even convinced some of our mutual friends that I had made shit up and always referenced the time I cheated on him. They would totally ignore the fact that he was the one losing his shit. Everything was just so out of control - from simple break ups to screaming/yelling at each other to him getting physical with me (which he would deny). We were just <strong>toxic</strong> for each other. I even felt bad for him after everything and would take him out for dinner. He later told me that his Parents "<em>kind of</em>" blamed me for what had happened to him; way to teach him not to accept responsibility for <strong><u>HIS</u></strong> actions.<br />
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We had continued this ridiculousness on/off for about 6 years. <strong>Horrible idea</strong>. There was the constant moving back/forth and the fact that my poor Little Big Man had to endure all of this drama too. <strong>It was my biggest mistake as a Mom.</strong> I kept thinking we could work things out and be a happy little family. I should have looked at the bigger picture and put a stop to it all a lot sooner. <br />
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Thankfully, I met my now Husband. It was scary at first; he treated me so differently - like a gentleman should. My Little Big Man took a liking to him so fast. I'm pretty sure that's why I fell head over heels for him. He didn't (and still doesn't) act possessive over me or ever try to manipulate me. He knows of my past and it never changed his opinion of me. He was a breath of fresh air and I felt a different type of happiness with him. <br />
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The best part: <strong>We found each other when neither of us was looking.</strong><br />
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<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgfTCp7IFAmzDlJbrdGuNci_AG974avnWs2Mvm4dFlSev6QKmVwPFw_WS4i117-3CUgW418fzgfKAfl8dq121Gdta4estceyuHg1hsH6o3xCgrP_hjraOxqRD6z5HwSZtGW4pjBQ0RCPxW5/s1600/IMG_4716.JPG" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="320" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgfTCp7IFAmzDlJbrdGuNci_AG974avnWs2Mvm4dFlSev6QKmVwPFw_WS4i117-3CUgW418fzgfKAfl8dq121Gdta4estceyuHg1hsH6o3xCgrP_hjraOxqRD6z5HwSZtGW4pjBQ0RCPxW5/s320/IMG_4716.JPG" width="213" /></a></div>
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I guess my point is don't let your past stop you from moving on. In my past relationship we both did a lot of screwing up. It should have ended the moment I found that message. It would have saved a lot of tears/money, etc. I don't let my past define who I am; I was young and dumb. I learned from my mistakes and took that relationship as a Lesson Learned. I know that there's no point in looking back because you can't change anything. So my words of advice are save yourself the heartache and <strong>MOVE FORWARD;</strong> you never know what possibilities can come your way.<br />
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<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhoaeGV1KjsemtJTXaAzzR6eEwPm3gnxzB2UjF-SRVIXHvcnFFz1ZV3ke8WsmtK8GdG-wiBxKnMcwbfM_Xf3w3AvVJQloMHZ8VFjILLRZ7xoXEZKeoucovZCb25j-85u_fqGoN2BjQdGXKV/s1600/IMG_4718.JPG" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="320" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhoaeGV1KjsemtJTXaAzzR6eEwPm3gnxzB2UjF-SRVIXHvcnFFz1ZV3ke8WsmtK8GdG-wiBxKnMcwbfM_Xf3w3AvVJQloMHZ8VFjILLRZ7xoXEZKeoucovZCb25j-85u_fqGoN2BjQdGXKV/s320/IMG_4718.JPG" width="224" /></a></div>
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Happy Monday!<br />
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xo,<br />
sssCarolina Meets Calihttp://www.blogger.com/profile/17689636397954464751noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1997951355792505008.post-42107877895903918262015-10-02T06:41:00.004-07:002015-10-02T07:11:23.190-07:00PURPLEHi errrbody!<br />
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According to my Instagram/Facebook - my hair is <strong><span style="color: purple;">PURPLE</span></strong> <strong><span style="color: purple;">is</span><span style="color: magenta;">h pink</span></strong> (:<br />
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As you may have noticed, I get bored rather <strong><em>QUICKLY</em></strong> when it comes to my hair color. My natural hair color is dark brown. I've had light brown, ombre, black, Ariel/Mermaid red <strong>*my favorite*</strong>, and now this odd shade of purple that I concocted. <br />
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I used <strong>Manic Panic: Ultra Violet</strong> and <strong>Manic Panic: Hot Hot Pink</strong>. I mixed it to the color I desired and covered all the blonde in my hair. It came out to a dark brown/purple/pink ombre. I liked it a lot; I felt like it resembled a dark enchanted forest [<em>hahahaa</em>].<br />
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<tr><td style="text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEinK5Vgf3ju2z2oliQRSTewwvjseUzXJB7cbP_w1ZNY1WeIeMA-0WF65nC2Vj3QoDaegPiYaXHsJHijxSmzhVlKEMNco1aEpOWibQTRRhNl0wZ84zz8EVs9NLdVy0fCQuAtovIho5GSSM7c/s1600/FirstPurple.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto;"><img border="0" height="308" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEinK5Vgf3ju2z2oliQRSTewwvjseUzXJB7cbP_w1ZNY1WeIeMA-0WF65nC2Vj3QoDaegPiYaXHsJHijxSmzhVlKEMNco1aEpOWibQTRRhNl0wZ84zz8EVs9NLdVy0fCQuAtovIho5GSSM7c/s320/FirstPurple.jpg" width="320" /></a></td></tr>
<tr><td class="tr-caption" style="text-align: center;">23-Sep-2015, the day after I dyed it</td></tr>
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One problem - it began to fade after <strong>ONE</strong> week! [<em>what. in. thee. fuck.</em>] It's now some ugly squid purple.</div>
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<tr><td style="text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEherO3Pw9-ogTAjO9XxBD_ctrJbeLWQOclXWg3oSKs0Xtuj8s-c0DvyKCr7kCZKjhBv2uGrz7t9mZjHNtzY27F4_BSOgB4VMlYccS3ZjOKkP5YmXYRH0PWIwl0VzEKwqCtSMaY_gSqYvs4f/s1600/FirstPurpleFaded.JPG" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto;"><img border="0" height="320" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEherO3Pw9-ogTAjO9XxBD_ctrJbeLWQOclXWg3oSKs0Xtuj8s-c0DvyKCr7kCZKjhBv2uGrz7t9mZjHNtzY27F4_BSOgB4VMlYccS3ZjOKkP5YmXYRH0PWIwl0VzEKwqCtSMaY_gSqYvs4f/s320/FirstPurpleFaded.JPG" width="240" /></a></td></tr>
<tr><td class="tr-caption" style="text-align: center;">1-Oct-2015</td></tr>
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So before the questions start rolling in, <strong><u>YES</u></strong> I use cold ass water to wash my hair [<em>it's a pain in the ass</em>] and <u><strong>NO</strong></u> I do not wash it errrrday [ew, <em>helluuur dry shampoo hee hee</em>]. My problem is since I am currently still following a workout plan, I do need to wash my hair more often than I want to; sweaty hair isn't very attractive.</div>
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<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEiTxKqAiGxeNDIbDX5BDC-z8Zai0OiHGQUuaUXvsnpXim68xx2XbW-Aq1qU2LYHsdHlw91aAhBH6lkUEU85-Sjcm1X1euVIMjxjUnWWEwx7_-5WnGnoU4vo8x6raSxLVQstdaPEkxZ8PyrA/s1600/FullSizeRender+%25283%2529.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="315" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEiTxKqAiGxeNDIbDX5BDC-z8Zai0OiHGQUuaUXvsnpXim68xx2XbW-Aq1qU2LYHsdHlw91aAhBH6lkUEU85-Sjcm1X1euVIMjxjUnWWEwx7_-5WnGnoU4vo8x6raSxLVQstdaPEkxZ8PyrA/s320/FullSizeRender+%25283%2529.jpg" width="320" /></a></div>
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So yesterday I decided to apply another purple/pink concoction on my entire head. I'm aware the dark parts of my hair will not be as purple as my ends,but I'm ok with that. </div>
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Anyways, now you can take a glance at my lovely adventure of coloring my hair - again. <strong>**P.S. I AM NOT A LICENSED COSMEOTOLOGIST, I DO THIS AT MY OWN RISK**</strong></div>
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<tr><td style="text-align: center;"><img border="0" height="320" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEh8yvnUFia_M2OBVJTNJIRismrokrqponTbVw47FN21rP-y7cHCdUXrySHp4eyti4bsVQfruU4_QZ4qyTDBhNv2yzbTXhKScWxsBNFUUeIQ4m9V16MLF-TXl8AN1Zx9q5FNmR0RIQKRQ8Js/s320/SecondPurpleGloves.JPG" style="margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto;" width="240" /></td></tr>
<tr><td class="tr-caption" style="text-align: center;">First - Put on gloves or your hands will look like Crayola just gangbanged it</td></tr>
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<tr><td style="text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEh9xmEx0RGyF8UBdptzKHqdad7dBZHGCJ40IFQWyR3MBPc5jwZ5K3e8C5x915Wjhf3FuKrNqo5B-ib2LPbwzpoQuoVQkD0ndAXKApp-fPSZvPtkOQTOiPMlmG4zsFZn_h79u0h_vsF9xFe4/s1600/SecondPurpleManicPanic.JPG" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto;"><img border="0" height="240" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEh9xmEx0RGyF8UBdptzKHqdad7dBZHGCJ40IFQWyR3MBPc5jwZ5K3e8C5x915Wjhf3FuKrNqo5B-ib2LPbwzpoQuoVQkD0ndAXKApp-fPSZvPtkOQTOiPMlmG4zsFZn_h79u0h_vsF9xFe4/s320/SecondPurpleManicPanic.JPG" width="320" /></a></td></tr>
<tr><td class="tr-caption" style="text-align: center;">Second - Get out your color(s)</td></tr>
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<tr><td style="text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhXfwoHO5LEs_1F_C90RKSeCfYJ9o59cTytIi3PAFMHB69rkCw-bFufOR8Z9kzUTLxF9yLp4QJyyL8a5Y_4KIfrjG5l36HVweICQnWYl9E9_IT39GhalEaccI_ibvF6Gw_5Viz-_XGEDPmy/s1600/SecondPurpleColor.JPG" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto;"><img border="0" height="320" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhXfwoHO5LEs_1F_C90RKSeCfYJ9o59cTytIi3PAFMHB69rkCw-bFufOR8Z9kzUTLxF9yLp4QJyyL8a5Y_4KIfrjG5l36HVweICQnWYl9E9_IT39GhalEaccI_ibvF6Gw_5Viz-_XGEDPmy/s320/SecondPurpleColor.JPG" width="240" /></a></td></tr>
<tr><td class="tr-caption" style="text-align: center;">Third - Mix your color(s) to the desired shade</td></tr>
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I kinda, sorta forgot to snap a pic of my lovely updo prior to covering it, so obviously that step is missing. So right now you'll just have to use your imagination and picture a messy/nappy mess with tons of silver clips holding it all in place on top of my head :)<br />
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<tr><td style="text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEj1H8aOas-Z0DNjfwJjajsKUUuUlXbvMlfgCRqWKy0pVYTIIWTq6J7MISC6aToprZwZ3Ib6NGVhi4XedXv7dtDZ8KffPD8KFEW7_n2cXNctt46-hWjhuU2HWNj_YUoPLviF4x1ff2KLXNrM/s1600/SecondPurpleColorWrap.JPG" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto;"><img border="0" height="320" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEj1H8aOas-Z0DNjfwJjajsKUUuUlXbvMlfgCRqWKy0pVYTIIWTq6J7MISC6aToprZwZ3Ib6NGVhi4XedXv7dtDZ8KffPD8KFEW7_n2cXNctt46-hWjhuU2HWNj_YUoPLviF4x1ff2KLXNrM/s320/SecondPurpleColorWrap.JPG" width="240" /></a></td></tr>
<tr><td class="tr-caption" style="text-align: center;">Fifth - Since I didn't have a clear/plastic cap to cover my head, I improvised & used a Walmart bag [<em>a girls gotta do, what a girls gotta do lol</em>]</td></tr>
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And drumroll please...<br />
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Louder...<br />
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<tr><td style="text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhXvzlfC_NE3qG5lqePemZrPWBxFmqjWJB7z2FZKFPVOpPmlJUH1n8clVhLPdiVnHtrlkXNOvbH2AbiqiiKEX5-swXZrs4Ox22sWAIn1EEG4B5pnm56zaW3TudeIe2kGwPZPkiTsgMta5dU/s1600/SecondPurpleColorFinish.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto;"><img border="0" height="320" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhXvzlfC_NE3qG5lqePemZrPWBxFmqjWJB7z2FZKFPVOpPmlJUH1n8clVhLPdiVnHtrlkXNOvbH2AbiqiiKEX5-swXZrs4Ox22sWAIn1EEG4B5pnm56zaW3TudeIe2kGwPZPkiTsgMta5dU/s320/SecondPurpleColorFinish.jpg" width="241" /></a></td></tr>
<tr><td class="tr-caption" style="text-align: center;">DONE! </td></tr>
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I made the mistake of applying the color <strong><em>TOO</em></strong> close to my scalp, more like ON my scalp - hence the staining. However, I am so happy with the outcome! This time it's more on the purple side, but that was the point. <br />
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Funny note, so shortly after my hair had finally air dried we had to go to the grocery store; there's supposed to be a hurricane [<em>Joaquin</em>] and we still needed food regardless. Anywho - while shopping I kept noticing people stare at me. My initial reaction is "<em>what the fuck are you looking at!?</em>" [<em>staring is rude, I can't help it</em>] I don't actually <strong>SAY</strong> it out loud [<em>most of the time</em>]. Then I realized my hair is this bright ass purple so no duh people are staring. My favorite reactions are when little girls see my hair and get all excited. An older lady shared with me that the two little girls that were shopping with her, her granddaughters I assume, <strong><u>LOVED</u></strong> my hair and I just thought it was so cute. <br />
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I'm getting closer and closer to becoming a mermaid, I have the bright hair and my thighs touch all the time ;p <br />
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xo,<br />
sss<br />
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Carolina Meets Calihttp://www.blogger.com/profile/17689636397954464751noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1997951355792505008.post-22863545824188790542015-09-16T07:24:00.003-07:002015-09-16T07:30:21.443-07:00You Can Do ItAt least that's what I keep telling myself. Thank God for coffee - I'm not joking, it's my Pre-Workout.<br />
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Good morning everyone!<br />
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As I stated in my last blog post I have begun my fitness journey. Guess what!? I <strong><u>STILL</u></strong> hate it.<br />
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I've already heard "<em>you don't need to workout, you're already skinny</em>"... <strong>No, just staaahp.</strong> Like every other female on this damn planet <u>I am my own worst critic</u>. I see what I don't like about myself and that's what matters to me. I don't care if anyone thinks I'm skinny or I'm fat. I'm worried about what <strong>*I*</strong> see and what <strong>*I*</strong> don't like.<br />
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I am working out because <u>I want to be skinny</u>. I know it's <em>recommended</em> to work out to be <strong>-fit-</strong> & <strong>-healthier-</strong>, but at the moment I'm thinking<strong> SKINNY</strong>. In my opinion I think that's where most people start. You see yourself in the mirror and dread seeing your reflection; at least that's how it is for me. I think a lot of fitness journeys begin at the thought of wanting to be skinny, but once you've got that routine down it's all about being more fit and being healthier and nothing is wrong with that.<br />
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I, however, am still trying to find the <strong>motivation</strong>.<br />
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In the past, when Monday came back around I was dreading it because I knew what the day entailed - work, cooking, cleaning, soccer practices, softball games, etc. Now when Monday pops back up I dread it because I know I have to do - my daily workout. <br />
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<strong>I'm doing it</strong> [<em>and doing it, and doing it well - oh why helluuur LL</em>].<br />
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I want to be able to look at myself in the mirror and think "<em>DAMN I look fiiiiiiine!</em>"... I don't want to feel like I need to hide from my Husband when I'm changing or feel the urge to turn off the lights when we're bumping uglies so he doesn't see me [<em>bwahaha</em>] or feeling excited about rockin' a bikini and not feeling like I have to cross my hands across my stomach to hide it. Yes, I have done all of the above. I want to feel good about myself when I see me naked [<em>way to sound vain</em>]. Of course I decided to be all <strong><em>hot & skinny</em></strong> when Fall hits... aka Sweater Weather...<br />
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Although, I will admit I am <strong><em>proud</em></strong> of how far I have come.<br />
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There have been mornings where I felt like <em>puking</em> while working out, but I pushed through it. There are even times where I feel like it is <em>impossible</em> to accomplish some of the exercises, but I do it. When I began my fitness journey I couldn't even plank for more than 30 seconds; you're supposed to hold it until you fail. Today I did it for 1 minute, every single time. Not only that, but I <u><strong>beat</strong></u> my 2 week quitting stage. I'm already on Phase 2, <strong>week 3</strong>. <br />
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I'm not at that stage where it becomes "<em>addicting</em>" - I don't foresee that ever happening, but I won't say it will "<em>never</em>" happen. <br />
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I have my good and bad days. I've already contemplated quitting because I don't feel skinnier and I don't see any changes, but I am definitely feeling SORE. I'm still hoping for quick results [<em>I can dream, right?</em>] So if you are thinking about getting fit or aren't as motivated - <strong><u>DO it</u></strong>; just get up an do it. <br />
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xo,<br />
sssCarolina Meets Calihttp://www.blogger.com/profile/17689636397954464751noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1997951355792505008.post-18815561631704688722015-09-07T08:29:00.004-07:002015-09-07T08:29:19.913-07:00Hello, Stay At Home MomGood morning beautiful people!<br />
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So <strong>September 1st, 2015</strong> marked the start of a new era for me.<br />
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I am officially a <strong>Stay At Home Mom</strong>. I don't want to say it's my new "job" because it's not a job - I'm just being a Mom.<br />
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So for all you asses who assume that title means: <br />
<ul>
<li>Sleeping all day</li>
<li>Binge watching Netflix [<em>what I honestly was hoping</em>]</li>
<li>Snackage all day</li>
<li>Pampering myself</li>
<li>Meeting up with girlfriends doing nothing</li>
<li>Blowing through money </li>
</ul>
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You are <u><strong>WRONG</strong></u>.<br />
<u></u><br />
My schedule may differ from some of you. My plan is to have my Newbie to have a schedule similar to what he had when he was still enrolled in daycare. So I still get up early in the morning and make sure my Little Big Man is up and getting ready for school. Then when it's time the three of us take a nice short walk down the street to walk my Little Big Man to school, <strong>BUT</strong> not before I make my <em>pre-workout</em> -<strong> COFFEE</strong>. Once the two us return home I make him breakfast and turn on one of his shows. I should add that I've become a big fan of Curious George. I'm also going to add "<em>expert in singing and reenacting children show's songs/dances</em>" to my resume; Little Einsteins, Special Agent Oso, and Chuggington are how we roll. Once he's done with breakfast I get him situated and then I do my <u><strong>NEW</strong></u> daily 30-minute workout.<br />
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***Yup, I now workout. I'm assuming my Husband became tired of hearing me bitch about how gross I feel/look. So for once he took the <em>initiative</em> and purchased a workout plan for me from <strong>HIITMAX</strong>. I'm still debating if I should feel insulted or thankful... [<em>we'll get back to that I'm sure</em>]. If you know me then you know how much I despise working out! I don't enjoy the whole feeling sore shit - it's a sign that you're either making progress or doing it incorrectly... yay? Did I mention how much I hate working out??? I normally quit within 2 weeks. I'm a fan of <strong>QUICK</strong> results... Which with working out it takes patience aaaaand results take more than 2 weeks to make a debut. Today I've began Week 2 of Phase 1 :)<br />
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Anyways - Once I'm done with my workout and get all nice and squeaky clean [<em>sweat is not my thing either</em>] I make us lunch. Which I didn't realize it would be such a pain to mix up lunch so there's a variety. After lunch I lay him down for a nap. Which has been a lot<strong> easier</strong> than I expected! When he was still in daycare he would sleep from 1.5-2 hours without any problems. Whereas at home on the weekends when we would try to get him to nap he would fight with us and maybe sleep for 30 minutes. I've made it a habit to do a relaxing/quiet activity prior to putting him down for his nap. He <strong>LOVES</strong> reading; the total opposite of his big brother [<em>he can't stand reading</em>]. This is where my "ME" time kicks in. I can either: a) nap, b) clean up, c) finally watch one of my shows. I end up trying to accomplish all 3 options. He sleeps for about 2 hours and then we get ready to pickup my Little Big Man from school. Once he's home it's homework time! And we can't forget planning dinner. I've gotten better at making dinner <strong><u>EARLIER</u></strong> so we're not eating at 7PM. So if you just repeat that every week and mix in soccer practice twice a week then you'll have an idea of my schedule. <br />
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I don't think it means being a SAHM is harder. Shit, I used to have to do all of this while I worked full time. But I do have a better understanding though, it's not any easier. However, I can actually say that I love my "job".<br />
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Welcome to a day in the life of lil 'ole me.<br />
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xo,<br />
sssCarolina Meets Calihttp://www.blogger.com/profile/17689636397954464751noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1997951355792505008.post-31905894032754655892015-08-31T05:57:00.007-07:002015-08-31T05:57:55.155-07:00Last Day As A Working MomGood morning!<br />
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<strong>Today is the day</strong> - My countdown has reached <strong>0</strong>. <br />
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I'm <em>excited</em>, but it's still <em>bittersweet</em>. <br />
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I know what you're probably thinking, "<em>well you were already contemplating about becoming a stay at home mom</em>"... <u>EXACTLY</u>. I was <strong><em>only</em></strong> contemplating the decision, but that decision was made for me. There were good days and there were bad days, just like any other job. Over the course of <strong>7 years</strong> some of my co-workers grew to be people I consider friends; I even found a couple that I consider my best. <br />
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It'll be different waking up and not having to rush through the house to get all pretty for my day ahead. It'll be different not having lunch plans almost <strong>EVERY</strong> day with the girls [<em>planning beginning at 0900 lol</em>]. It'll be different not being spoiled with <strong>Dunkin Donuts</strong> coffee when the time permits. It'll be different not whispering through our cubicle (hand-made) window about the<strong><em> assholes</em></strong> in the office.<br />
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I will not miss dealing with the people who <em>lied</em> and got away with it. I will not miss the <em>favoritism</em>. I will not miss the rules that changed due to a <em>change in mood</em>. I will not miss typing last minute orders that popped up in my email. I will not miss the <em>millions</em> of lists/rosters I've had to create and upkeep. I will not miss the fact that I haven't had the tiniest raise in 2-3 years, but other people did - some not close to deserving.<br />
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This is a <strong>new beginning</strong> for me and for my family.<br />
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It's a BIG change and a step in a new direction. I've always done well with adapting (due to constant moving when my Dad was still Active Duty). Since I had my Little Big Man I've always worked. So I'm going from always making my own income, to now depending on someone else's; that just doesn't sit well with me. I almost feel kind of <em>helpless</em>.<br />
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But you know what, <strong>I got this</strong>. <br />
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xo,<br />
sssCarolina Meets Calihttp://www.blogger.com/profile/17689636397954464751noreply@blogger.com0