Saturday, January 11, 2020

Hello -- Again.

Whats up guys?!

If you're new to my blog, hi I'm Stephanie.  And if you're returning to my blog, hiiiiii!

Per the usual, I figured "it's a new year, why not start blogging again?" So here I am.

It's been so long so I'll give you a quick summary of what's happened in my life.  My husband did return from deployment (yes, my blogs are that behind).  He's now a Drill Instructor.  I still work out, but with better focus and I've learned quite a bit).  My kids are still constantly growing too fast.  I'm still a stay-at-home mom.

But I thought what better way to make a comeback, than to share one of my near and dear stories. I'm sure I've shared some of it before; I may have even blogged about it in the past. But here goes nothing...

Where do I begin?

I was 16 & pregnant (before it became a TV show).  Never did I ever imagine that I'd be "one of those girls".  But of course, I was young and stupid.  I thought I was invincible.  Boy, was I wrong!  Unfortunately, I don't have many photos of my pregnancy.  I was too busy feeling humiliated, embarrassed, and scared - to name a few.  Plus it would have been evidence of my bad decisions.  Any photos that I do have I had covered my face or asked that my face not be in it.  At the time I thought that I would never want to look back on these moments.  Again, I was far from right.  I wish I had photos of how my baby bump progressed every month.  But how should I have posed?  Hold my belly and stare with so much admiration and anticipation?  Candidly laugh with excitement?  It was such an odd time for me.  It wouldn't have been the full 9 months considering I didn't find out until I was 5-6 months pregnant.  [insert surprised expressions and gasps]  Yup, you read that correctly.  That my friends is what happens when you have (a little TMI moment) an irregular period.  Not only did that play a factor, but I'm a small person so I wasn't really showing.  Anyways, I didn't get to enjoy my pregnancy like most people envision or hope to.  My whole mindset was survival.  Luckily, being pregnant didn't deter me away from my schooling.  I continued going to school until it was close to my due date and then I was home schooled for a short while before/after the birth of my sweet baby boy.  I was due on New Years Eve, but he wasn't ready so I was almost 2 weeks overdue before I was finally induced.  I ended up having an emergency c-section instead.  But the relief was short-lived; this was only the beginning.  I now had this little baby depending on me which made it much more real that my life had changed completely.  I'm forever grateful that my family helped me, rather than abandon me.  I still got to play soccer and I graduated high school.

Although I resented myself for bringing a baby into the world while being so young, I don't regret him.  Having him made me grow up.  He taught me to take responsibility for my actions, even if it was inadvertently.  He made me better.  I could have easily taken the cowardly/easy way out - had an abortion and pretend it had never happened.  But I couldn't do that to someone so innocent just because of my naive actions.

*Actions have consequences*

My pregnancy may have brought some unwanted attention to myself and my family, but here we are 14 years later and thriving.

He's an all star athlete.  He's strategic.  He likes to play chess.  He is a picky-eater, but tends to like foods I'd least expect (spicy tuna rolls, broccoli).  He's competitive.  He's reserved and quiet until you get to know him.  He loves sweet tea and chocolate milk.  He plays Fortnite constantly.  He likes singing and enjoys singing in his school's talent show.  He's taller than me (and never lets me forget).  He's (for the most part) a great big brother.  He still lets me hug him. He picks the most random times to give me hugs and little pecks on the cheek.  He would eat McDonalds and Dominos everyday if he could.  He wants to be a pro soccer player or Youtuber.  Regardless,

Forever my baby he'll be.


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